Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 26: Episode 1







00a: Rob Lowe / Eminem

Rob Lowe's Monologue

.....Rob Lowe
Man #1 In Audience.....Jerry Minor
Man #2 In Audience.....Dennis McNicholas
Woman #1 In Audience.....Paula Pell
Man #3 In Audience.....Jim Downey

Rob Lowe: Thank you! I am just really excited to be here tonight, because it's only a month away for the Presidential election, and not only do I feel like I've sort of learned a lot about the presidency from my role on "The West Wing", but I really do feel honored to be part of a drama that tackles real issues faced in the White House..

Man #1 In Audience: Excuse me, Rob?

Rob Lowe: Yeah?

Man #1 In Audience: Yeah, your show is about the White House. Have you ever met President Clinton?

Rob Lowe: Yeah, I have had the privilege of spending some time with the President, as well as the First Lady.

Man #1 In Audience: So you've met Hillary Clinton?

Rob Lowe: Yes, I have.

Man #1 In Audience: How big is her booty?

Rob Lowe: I.. I.. I just don't know. Uh.. I have had the privilege of spending time with the First Lady, and she is a really smart, articulate woman, and a very tough campaigner. [ points to audience member ] Yes?

Man #2 In Audience: Uh.. I have a question about Vice-President Al Gore.

Rob Lowe: Oh.. go ahead.

Man #2 In Audience: His daughters are hot.

Rob Lowe: That's not a question.

Man #2 In Audience: Oh. Okay. Which one of his daughters do you think's the hottest?

Rob Lowe: Well, you know, that is actually totally irrelevent.. Corinne. Corinne, she's very hot! [ points to woman in audience ] Yes?

Woman #1 In Audience: I'm a huge fan of "The West Wing"..

Rob Lowe: Thank you very much!

Woman #1 In Audience: And I was so excited when they won nine Emmies. How many did you win?

Rob Lowe: [ pause ] None.

Woman #1 In Audience: Oh. Well.. it's still an honor to be nominated.

Rob Lowe: I wasn't nominated.

Woman #1 In Audience: Well.. working with so many talented actors.. is a reward in itself.

Rob Lowe: Yes. [ points to audience member ]

Man #3 In Audience: Uh.. my question isn't about your show "The West Wing", it's about the actual West Wing in the White House.

Rob Lowe: Oh! Oh, I think maybe I can help you, because the set that we shoot on is an exact replica of the West Wing.

Man #3 In Audience: Oh, great. Now, is the room where they blow the president located in the West Wing, or down the hall?

Rob Lowe: [ shakes head ] I really don't know.. you know, we have a great show tonight - Eminem is here, so wake up the kids!


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