Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 26: Episode 2




00b: Kate Hudson / Radiohead

Rabun to Shuri

Rabun.....Maya Rudolph
Shuri.....Kate Hudson
Lenny.....Jimmy Fallon
Squiggy.....Chris Kattan
Karumain.....Chris Parnell

[ TV Nippon logo appear; Japanese music starts playing ]

Female Announcer: You are watching TV Nippon.

Announcer: Minasama, minasama, goteyamakikku-sabano... Rabun to Shuri!

[ Super: Rabun To Shuri ]

[ cut to opening sequence; Rabun and Shuri are skipping down a sidewalk ]

Rabun and Shuri: Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, roku, shichi, hachi, samieru, shumazu, Hantenbana Incorporated! [ giggles, then runs off ]

[ cue music; show Rabun and Shuri doing various tasks: pulling a Biore strip off Rabun's forehead; working at the Asahi bottling plant; dancing and running into each other ]

Music: "Kihono kihona matte, nakiyanowarimatte, watashi-yaji-ya-noito... Kitteru matte, to matte, anatano... tarakuu... watashiuuuu..."

[ show Rabun and Shuri together; actors names "Miho Kajiyama" and "Yuki Akugai" appear on screen ]

Female Announcer: Rabun to Shuri osaki ni, Live Studio Audience.

[ open sketch inside Rabun and Shuri's apartment ]

[ Shuri runs in, looking around for something ]

Shuri: Rabun! Rabun! Watashi-no "Bobo Kitty-chan", hajime-mashitte!

Rabun: [ stands ] Shuu-ri! Anata no Bobo Kitty-chan, nanidenowa?

Rabun and Shuri: [ calling out as they search through things in the apartment ] Bobo Kitty-chan! Bobo Kitty-chan!! Bobo Kitty-chan!!!

Rabun: Shuu-ri! Mitte-ano. [ they sit down at the table ] Milk to Pepsi wa, arimasuyo?

Shuri: [ picks up the cup, smells it, then puts it down ] Ooo, miruku beshi, ooh. Watashi!

[ Suddenly, sliding doors open, and Lenny and Squiggy appear ]

Lenny and Squiggy: Kon-nichiwa!!!

[ the two stumble clumsily down the stairs ]

Lenny: Konnichiwa, Rabun.

Shuri: Renny, Suku-iigii, watashi no Bobo Kitty-chan, dorichi-wa?

Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ]

Rabun: Renny, Sukuiigii, anata-no Bobo Kitty-chan, doko desuka?

Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ]

[ Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ]

[ cut to TV Nippon logo, then a commercial: A little Japanese boy runs through a grocery store. Then show a cockroach crawling to the center of the screen.]

Ad Jingle: Tan-chin, tan-chin... koki pokko!

[ The cockroach magically turns into a pastry. Show product logo (a wacky duck) as Japanese boy runs off the screen ]

[ back to Rabun To Shuri... Karumain enters room ]

Karumain: [ singing ] Onagi-to no Rags to Riches!

Rabun and Shuri: Karumain!

[ Karumain jumps off stairs stylishly, then takes a stuffed animal, Bobo Kitty-chan, and hands it to Shuri ]

Karumain: Bobo Kitty!

Shuri: Oah! Karumain, domo! [ bows ]

Rabun: Domo! [ bows repeatedly ] Karumain, domo arigato-gozaimasu!

[ everyone in the room is now bowing over and over at each other ]

[ Lenny and Squiggy bow heads towards each other, bumping their heads together and stumbling back ]

[ as everyone laughs at what happened, Karumain takes Shuri's hand and pulls her over in his arms romantically ]

Karumain: Shuri...

Shuri: [ stopping Karumain ] Ah... cold shower! Cold shower!

Lenny and Squiggy: Cold showa?! [ starts taking off their clothing; Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ]

[ cue closing music ]

Music: Watashi-uuuuu...

[ SUPER: Executive Producers: Gekko Mitzusaka, Taki Mazaki, Eitoko Miki ]


Submitted by: Paul Buxton


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