Mena Suvari's Monologue

.....Mena Suvari
.....Will Ferrell
.....Molly Shannon
.....Lorne Michaels
.....Tracy Morgan



Mena Suvari: This is so cool to be hosting "Saturday Night Live!" This is like a dream come true. It all started when I got a part in the movie "American Beauty". But I had an equally amazing experience working with the cast of this show. Here, let me show you. [ walks off stage ] I mean, look at this studio, can you believe it? I thought you'd enjoy seeing what goes on at the beginning of the show. I mean, I've learned so much this week about doing live television. [ finds Will Ferrell backstage ]

Will Ferrell: [ dressed in his Spartan Cheerleader costume ] Hey, Mena! Good luck tonight!

Mena Suvari: Thanks, Will! [ to camera ] That's Will Ferrell. He's so cute. [ music from "American Beauty" plays, as Mena falls into a trance imagining Will seducing her amidst rose petals flowing from his chest ] Spec-tact-u-lar!

Will Ferrell: Have a good show.

Mena Suvari: Yeah, thanks.. you, too, Will.. [ continues walking down the hall ] And this is where they write the cue cards, and down the hall is the Props Department. [ spots Molly Shannon ] Hey, Molly Shannon!

Molly Shannon: Hi, Mena! You're gonna have a great show tonight!

Mena Suvari: [ happy ] You think so? [ falls into her trance again, imagining Molly lying on a bed of rose petals ]

Molly Shannon: Are you okay?

Mena Suvari: Oh, sorry.. what were you saying? [ falls back into her trance, now imagining Molly dressed as Mary Katherine Gallagher ] Mmm.. yea-eah..!

Molly Shannon: Mean? Are you alright?

Mena Suvari: [ snaps out of her trance ] Oh, yeah! I'm fine! Goodybe, Molly! [ turns down the hall ] And this is where the extras hang out.. [ Lorne Michaels and Tracy Morgan pass through the hall ] Lorne! Tracy!

Lorne Michaels: Hello, Mena. How are you?

Mena Suvari: I'm very well, thanks.

Tracy Morgan: Mean, you fine! Ain't she, Lorne?

Lorne Michaels: Fine. Definitely fine. [ Lorne falls into a similar trance, only he envisions Tracy Morgan lying in a bed of rose petals instead ]

Tracy Morgan: Lorne? Everything copasetic? You alright, dog?

[ Lorne silently turns and walks away, leaving Tracy confused ]

Mena Suvari: [ back on stage ] We've got a great show, Lenny Kravitz is here. So, stick around, we'll be right back!


SNL Transcripts