Wake Up Little Suzie Suzie.....Mena Suvari Carl.....Tracy Morgan Suzie’s Father.....Will Ferrell Carl’s Friend.....Jerry Minor [Save The Last Dance video cover shown] Announcer: From the makers of ‘Save The Last Dance’… [b/w footage of a Suzie riding a horse, which fades to black] Announcer: …comes the story of a girl whose life will never be the same… [cut to Carl at Suzie’s bedside in a hospital. She appears to be unconscious.] Carl: You must be Suzie. My name is Carl. Announcer: It was an unlikely friendship… [Carl makes a peek-a-boo face at Suzie, who is still unconscious] Carl: Peek-a-boo! [giggles] You make me laugh, girl! Announcer: …that blossomed into love. [cut to Carl lying beside Suzie, as if in a bedroom scene] Carl: I love you, Suzie. I always will. Announcer: And a father who didn’t understand… [cut to Carl in a confrontation with Suzie’s father in her hospital room] Suzie’s Father: I forbid you to see my daughter. Carl: I didn’t plan on it, it just happened. This is the 21st century, Mr. Webber! She loves me!! Suzie’s Father: She doesn’t even know you. She’s in a coma. Carl: Even if she wasn’t in a coma, you wouldn’t accept me! Suzie’s Father: Well, we’ll never know. She’s in a coma. Carl: I think I see what this is. White girl, black guy, I get it. Suzie’s Father: No, you don’t. Again, she’s in a coma. Carl: That doesn’t change the fact that I love her! Suzie’s Father: It should! She’s never met you, ‘cause she’s in a coma! Carl: You’re really hung up on this coma thing, pops. [Video cover art is shown, which parodies the ‘Save The Last Dance’ cover] Announcer: Wake Up Little Suzie. It was a forbidden love. Even his friends didn’t get it. [cut to Carl in the hospital room with his friend] Carl’s Friend: Man, you actin’ crazy with that white girl! Carl: You don’t know her! Carl’s Friend: You don’t know her either! She in a coma! [cut to still of Carl and Suzie] Announcer: The entire town was against them, and the only thing on their side was love. [cut to hospital room, two officers are at the door] Suzie’s Father: There he is, officers. Arrest him! Carl: Wait, wait. She loves me! I’ll prove it to you all! [to Suzie] Suzie, I know that you can hear me. Show them! If you love me, when I let your hand go, just let it fall to the bed. [Carl lifts Suzie’s hand, and lets it fall limply onto the bed. The officers walk over to Carl and attempt to handcuff him] Carl: See? She loves me! Suzie’s Father: Officers, wait! [he approaches Suzie’s father, the officers back away] Unhand my…son! [he gives Carl a quick hug] Suzie: Daddy...daddy? Suzie’s Father: My little girl! She’s okay! Suzie: Edgar? Carl: Whoa, whoa, whoa, who’s Edgar, bitch? Suzie’s Father: Edgar…is her horse. Carl: Oh! [laughs] Suzie: Dr. Carl? Carl: You know my name. [leans in closer to her] It’s me, Dr Carl, it’s me, Dr Carl… Suzie’s Father: It’s nice to have a doctor in the family Carl: No, I’m an orderly. Dr Carl’s my deejay name. [Video cover art is shown again] Announcer: Wake Up Little Suzie. Coming Soon. [fade] Thanks to Ann*e Hussey for this transcript! SNL Transcripts