Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 28: Episode 19


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:



Special Guests:

Cameos:


May 10th, 2003

Adrien Brody

Sean Paul

Wayne Wonder

None

Elliot Brody

Sylvia Plachy

Emily Spivey

American Idol
Summary: Ryan Seacrest (Jimmy Fallon) repeatedly cuts away to commercial instead of announcing the big winner.

Recurring Characters: Ryan Seacrest, Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, Randy Jackson< Mya.

Transcript


Montage


Adrien Brody's Monologue
Summary: Adrien Brody kisses women in the audienc and, thanks his mom, Sylvia Plachy.

Bio: Photographer Sylvia Plachy (1943-) has had portraits and photo essays published in The Village Voice, The New Yorker, and other art periodicals.

Transcript


Mom Jeans
Summary: The shapely fit that says you're a mom, not a woman.

Transcript


Brian Fellow's Safari Planet
Summary: Brian Fellow (Tracy Morgan) fears that a hairless cat will shave his head.

Recurring Characters: Brian Fellow.

Transcript


Self-Involved GUy
Summary: A self-obsessed man (Chris Kattan) creeps out his date (Rachel Dratch).


Live With Regis & Kelly
Summary: Wild, Wild Trivia winner Pete Sokolov (Adrien Brody) has barely survived his dangerous prize vacation.

Recurring Characters: Regis Philbin, Kelly Ripa, Gelman.

Transcript


TV Funhouse
Summary: In Rob Smigel's spoof of Middle Eastern cartoons, Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein are sneaky partners in crime.

Transcript


Sean Paul performs "Get Busy"


Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina Fey
Summary: Qrplt*xk (Rachel Dratch) is a creepy "X-Men 2" reject. Elton John (Horatio Sanz) sings his lyrics for a musical about the Vampire Lestat.

Recurring Characters: Qrplt*xk, Elton John.

Transcript


Lensmasters
Summary: Rude employees Sebastian (Adrien Brody) and Roland (Chris Kattan) show their offbeat glasses creations to a woman (Amy Poehler).


Dance Class
Summary: Adult students take dance lessons.

Recurring Characters: Gabe Fisher, Ruth Weinstock, A.J., Vasquez Gomez-Vasquez.


Wayne Wonder performs "No Letting Go"


Velvet Productions
Summary: The homoerotic pornographic film review board members can't think of a unique title for their version of "The Pianist."

Transcript


Goodnights
Transcript



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