SNL Transcripts: Ashton Kutcher: 03/19/05: Gwen Stefani performs “Hollaback Girl”

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 30: Episode 15



04o: Ashton Kutcher / Gwen Stefani

Gwen Stefani performs “Hollaback Girl”

…..Ashton Kutcher
…..Gwen Stefani

David Spade: Ladies and gentlemen – Jack Johnson, featuring G. Love!

Ashton Kutcher: [ screaming like a lunatic ] Once again – Gwen Stefaniiiiiiiiii!!!!

[ Kutcher steps aside, as camera zooms onto the stage. The stage lights up to reveal Gwen Stefani standing in front of a neatly-lined marching band ]

Gwen Stefani:
“Uh huh, this my, ugh
All the girls stomp your feet like this.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!

I heard that you were talking, ugh
And you didn’t think that I would hear it
People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up
So I’m ready to attack, gonna lead the pack
Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out
That’s right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

Oooh, this my, shh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!

That’s right, dude, meet me at the bleachers
No principals, no student-teachers
All the boys want to be the winner, but there can only be one
So I’m gonna fight, gonna give it my all
Gonna make you fall, gonna sock it to you
That’s right, I’m the last one standing, another one bites the dust A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!

Let me hear you say, this, ugh, is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
This, ugh, is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
This, ugh, is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
This, ugh, is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
‘Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl.

Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!
Oooh, this my, ugh! This my, ugh!”

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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