Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 32: Episode 6







06f: Ludacris

Young Douglas: Hypin' the Classics

Young Douglas.....Ludacris
Harry Connick, Jr.....Jason Sudeikis
Barbra Streisand.....Maya Rudolph
James Blunt.....Andy Samberg
Dolly Parton.....Amy Poehler
Louis Armstrong.....Kenan Thompson

[ show Young Douglas in a series of rap poses ]

Announcer: Young Douglas. For over a decade, he's been the loudest, the fiercest, the most respected hype man in the rap business!

Young Douglas: What? What?

[ show images of Young Douglas backing other rap artists ]

Announcer: Providing onstage back-up for multi-platinum recording artists like Eminem, 50 Cent, and Snoop Dogg!

Young Douglas: Ye-eah!

[ show Young Douglas' new CD ]

Announcer: And now, for the first time ever, Young Douglas is teaming up with the biggest names in adult contemporary music - on the new album "Young Douglas: Hypin' the classics."

Young Douglas: Yo! Go cop my album, 'cause I'm gonna kill it!

Announcer: Featuring: Harry Connick, Jr.

[ dissolve to a grinning Harry Connick, Jr. performing, as young Douglas occasionally jumps into the scene to hype his lines ]

[ SUPER: "It Had To Be You (Hell Yeah)" ]

Harry Connick, Jr.: "It had to be you --"

Young Douglas: Yeaaaahh! It had to be US, baby, ha ha!

Harry Connick, Jr.: "It had to be you --"

Young Douglas: It couldn't've been nobody else - What?! What?! What?!

Harry Connick, Jr.: "I wandered around --"

Young Douglas: Tell me whatchoo was doin'?

Harry Connick, Jr.: "And finally found --"

Young Douglas: Tell 'em whatchoo FOUND, boy-eeee!

Harry Connick, Jr.: "The somebody who --"

Young Douglas: New York City, make some noiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzze!!

Announcer: And, yo - you ain't NEVER heard the song stylin's of Ms. Barbra Streisand, until you've heard 'em with Young Douglas!

[ dissolve to Barbra Streisand performing, as young Douglas occasionally jumps into the scene to hype his lines ]

[ SUPER: "The Way We Were (Get Ya Damn Hands Up)" ]

Barbra Streisand: "Mem'ries --"

Young Douglas: Uh-oh! She recollectin', y'all!

Barbra Streisand: "Like the corner of my mind --"

Young Douglas: She takin' it back to nineteen-seventy-THREE! Whoop, whoop, whoop!

Barbra Streisand: "Misty watercolored mem'ries --"

Young Douglas: Drop it on the beat, get familiar with what's going ON!

Barbra Streisand: "Of the way we were --"

Young Douglas: Get ya damn hands UP! Yeaaaahhh!

Announcer: Young Douglas! When he's not smokin' blunts at the dog track, he's layin' down smokin' tracks with his dawg, James Blunt.

[ dissolve to James Blunt performing, as young Douglas occasionally jumps into the scene to hype his lines ]

[ SUPER: "You're Beautiful (That Ass)" ]

James Blunt: "You're beautiful --"

Young Douglas: That ass!

James Blunt: "You're beautiful --"

Young Douglas: He talkin' 'bout that ass, yo!

James Blunt: "You're beautiful, it's true --"

Young Douglas: Your body is bangin', baby! Whoop! Whoop!

Announcer: And, check it out - Young Douglas is spittin' straight fire with Dolly Parton!

[ dissolve to Dolly Parton performing, as young Douglas occasionally jumps into the scene to hype his lines ]

[ SUPER: "I Will Always Love You (Damn)" ]

Dolly Parton: "And Iiiiiii-yiiiii-eeeeee, will always love yoooooouuuu --"

Young Douglas: With breasteses, I would always love you, too, baby! Whoo!!

Dolly Parton: "Iiiiiiiii will always love you --"

Young Douglas: Yeah! Check 'em out, y'all! It's like Beyonce's ass built a house up north, and painted it WHITE! Look! Check 'em out! Look!

Dolly Parton: "Iiiiiiiii will always love you --"

Young Douglas: Hey, check it out from the side! Check it out, beat, you like that! Yeah! Yeah!

Announcer: And he ain't just hypin' the livin' - he's gettin' straight grindin' with the DEAD, too! Listen to this classic, with Louis Armstrong:

[ dissolve to black-and-white Louis Armstrong performing, as young Douglas occasionally jumps into the scene to hype his lines ]

[ SUPER: "Let's Call The Whole Thing Off (Gangsta Anthem)" ]

Louis Armstrong: "You say Tomato --"

Young Douglas: Say it how you say it, 'Strong! Yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Louis Armstrong: "You say Potato --"

Young Douglas: Get the word out, baby - yeah! Take that, take that, take that, take that!

Louis Armstrong: "Tomato --"

Young Douglas: What's up, what, WHAT?!

Louis Armstrong: "Potato --"

Young Douglas: 2007, baby!

Louis Armstrong: "Let's call the whole thing off --" [ blows trumpet ]

Young Douglas: Pop, pop, pop! It's off, it's off! What!

Announcer: You've loved these songs for as long as you can remember. Now hear them again for the first motherfu--in' time.

Young Douglas: Hypin' the Classics, is availabe at Best Buy, as well as on Canal Street and the mix tape spot at 14th and 6th.

[ fade ]


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