Saturday Night Live Transcripts
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Season 32: Episode 15
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 Air Date:
Host:
Musical Guest:
Special Guests:
Cameos:
Guest Writers:
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March 17th, 2007
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Snow Patrol
None
Chris Rock
Kent Sublette
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SNL Special Report: Road to the White House
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Summary: Chris Rock gives his political insight on the candidates vying for the Presidency in 2008, and compares the qualities of Democratic frontrunners Oback Barama and Hillary Clinton.
Note: In dress rehearsal, Chris Rock performed this bit as a commentary on "Weekend Update."
Transcript
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Julia Louis-Dreyfus' Monologue
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Summary: Julia Louis-Dreyfus shows off clips which make the point that her life is constantly under scrutiny from the media.
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Oprah
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Summary: Oprah Winfrey (Maya Rudolph) loudly praises the work of Rhonda Byrne's (Amy Poehler) new book, "The Secret."
Recurring Characters: Oprah Winfrey.
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Monex
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Summary: Gold enthusiast (Kristen Wiig) praises the power and allure of gold and gold-covered objects.
Transcript
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Restless Penis Syndrome
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Summary: When a woman (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) is convinced that her husband (Jason Sudeikis) is fooling around behind her back, he justifies his behavior by admitting to suffering from Restless Penis Syndrome amd quickly films a public service announcement for it in their bedroom.
Transcript
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La Rivista Della Televisione con Vinny Vedecci
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Summary: Fast-talking Italian talk show host Vinny Vedecci (Bill Hader) interviews Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
Recurring Characters: Vinny Vedecci.
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Snow Patrol performs "You're All I Have"
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Bio: Alternative rock band based in Glasgow, Sweden; members are: Gary Lightbody (lead vocals, guitar), Paul Wilson (bass guitar, backing vocals), Jonny Quinn (drums, percussion), Nathan Connolly (guitar, backing vocals), Tom Simpson (keyboards).
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Weekend Update with Amy Poehler & Seth Meyers
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Summary: Judge Larry Seidlin (Fred Armisen) uses his loony sense of logic to discuss the possible resignation of Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. Amy Poehler drunk-dials Seth Meyers after celebrating a ltitle St. Patrick's Day cheer.
Recurring Characters: Judge Larry Seidlin.
Transcript
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Deep House Dish
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Summary: DJ Dynasty Handbag (Kenan Thompson) and co-host T'Shane (Andy Samberg) dish out more of the club music scene.
Recurring Characters: DJ Dynasty Handbag, T'Shane.
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CBS Cares
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Summary: Julia Louis-Dreyfus tangos with obnoxious boom mike operator Jeff (Jason Sudeikis) while filming a CBS-sponsored breast cancer PSA directed by Mike Underballs (Bill Hader).
Recurring Characters: Mike Underballs, Jeff.
Transcript
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Home-bots
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Summary: A lottery-winning couple (Jason Sudekis, Julia Louis-Dreyfus) have splurged on a group of robots (Will Forte, Fred Armisen, Kenan Thompson) that are not only slow and inefficient, but also repair one another in exchange for group sex benefits.
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Snow Patrol performs "Chasing Cars"
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The Search for the Next Pussycat Doll
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Summary: The CW Network hosts a competition to find the next member of the Pussycat Dolls.
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Dress Rehearsal Cuts
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A Message From the President of the United States
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Summary: President George W. Bush's remarks on current events delineates into March Madness.
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Nike Pick Ups
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Summary: Sneakers for guys can't play basketball very well.
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American Hairlines
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Summary: Airline personnel suffer from receding hairlines.
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An SNL Digital Short
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Summary: Andy Samberg raps about his brither-in-law Roy.
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Hearing Test
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Summary: A woman (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) receives an old-fashioned hearing test.
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Hockey Date
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Summary: A hockey fanatic (Will Forte) is frustrated when his blind date (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) knows nothing about his favorite sport.
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SNL Transcripts
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