Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 34: Episode 19


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:

Bit Players:



April 4th, 2009

Seth Rogen

Phoenix

None

None

Paula Pell

Jorma Taccone

A Special Address From the President of the United States
Summary: While in Europe, President Barack Obama (Fred Armisen) outlines which companies he will and will agree to bail out in the future.

Recurring Characters: President Barack Obama.

Transcript


Montage


Seth Rogen's Monologue
Summary: Audience members don't quite recognize Seth Rogen after his recent weight loss.

First Hosted: 07b.

Transcript


The Fast & The Bi-Curious
Summary: Fast cars and male-on-male kissing dominate the trailer for the action film sequel.

Transcript


Save the Funnies
Summary: At the Marriott Hotel, Dick Tracy (Jason Sudeikis) leads a group of comics page characters and features in the struggle to find a way to keep the newspaper business afloat.

Recurring Characters: Cathy, Marcy.

Transcript


La Rivista Della Televisione
Summary: Vinny Vedecci (Bill Hader) interviews Seth Rogen, the infamous "Bear Man" of American cinema.

Recurring Characters: Vinnie Vedecci, crew members, Vinny's son.


An SNL Digital Short
Summary: Around the office, Andy Samberg conducts everyday business activities "Like The Boss".

Transcript


Girlfriend Voices
Summary: Trio of buddies (Seth Rogen, Bill Hader, Andy Samberg) creep one another out when they employ their cutesy-pie voices during cell phone conversations with their girlfriends.


Phoenix performs "Lisztomania"


Weekend Update with Seth Meyers
Summary: Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich (Jason Sudeikis) is desperate to launch a get-rich-quick scheme. French Def Jam comedian Jean K. Jean (Kenan Thompson) comments on Barack Obama's European tour. Madonna (Kristen Wiig) is upset that she was unable to adopt an African baby, then Angelina Jolie (Abby Elliott) wanders in for a game of oneupmanship.

Recurring Characters: Rod Blagojevich, Jean K. Jean, Angelina Jolie, Madonna.


The Presentation
Summary: An office worker (Seth Rogens) screws up when the audio for his presentation is swapped with "You're The One That I Want" from "Grease".


Milestone High
Summary: Geeky Eli (Andy Samberg) attempts to tutor dumb Lance (Seth Rogen), who claims to be the school's star basketball player.


Clancy T. Bachleratt and Jackie Snad Sing Easter Songs about Spaceships, Toddlers, Model T. Cars & Jars of Beer
Summary: Spokesman (Seth Rogen) touts the joint Easter music collaboration of patriotic country musicians Clancy T. Bachleratt (Will Forte) and Jackie Snad (Kristen Wiig).

Recurring Characters: Clancy T. Bachleratt, Jackie Snad.


Phoenix performs "1901"


Muppets Hit & Run
Summary: The Muppets are shocked when Rolf (Seth Rogen) rolls the bus over a pedestrian and is convinced they can get away with it if they just keep quiet.

Recurring Characters: Nipsey Russell.

Transcript


Goodnights
Transcript





SNL Transcripts