Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 35: Episode 15


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

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February 27th, 2010

Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez

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We Are the World III
Summary: Quincy Jones (Kenan Thompson) makes the mistake of organizing "We Are the World 3" to explain the first half-assed remake of "We Are the World" that followed the Haiti earthquake.

Recurring Characters: Willie Nelson, David Crosby, Eddie Vedder.

Transcript


Montage


Jennifer Lopez's Monologue
Summary: Jennifer Lopez announces that she's changed her image, which is bad news for an ex-member of her entourage (Kenan Thompson) and a pair of drag queen fans (Jason Sudeikis, Bill Hader).

Transcript


Gyne-Lotrimin Ladies' World Cup of Curling 1987
Summary: Commentators Pete Twinkle (Jason Sudeikis) and Greg Stink (Will Forte) keep the Gyne-Lotrimin sponsorship flowing amid confusion regarding curling match between Helga Birkenstock (Kristen Wiig) and Maria Shakira Prinze, Jr. (Jennifer Lopez).

Recurring Characters: Pete Twinkle, Greg Stink.


An SNL Digital Short
Summary: A visual display of the various "Flags of the World".

Transcript


Hollywood Dish
Summary: Entertainment hosts Brady Trunk (Bill Hader) and Anastasia Sticks (Kristen Wiig) feign interest while interviewing Jennifer Lopez.

Recurring Characters: Brady Trunk, Anastasia Sticks.

Transcript


Telemundo Olympics Coverage
Summary: Telemundo news anchors (Jennifer Lopez, Fred Armisen) are forced to cover the Winter Olympics, even though they can't comprehend the merit in cold weather sports performances.

Transcript


Undercover Celebrity Boss
Summary:

Recurring Characters: Martha Stewart.

Transcript


Jennifer Lopez performs "Pieces"


Weekend Update with Seth Meyers
Summary: Bobby Moynihan, Gov. David Paterson (Fred Armisen).

Recurring Characters: Gov. David Paterson.


Besos Y Lagrimas
Summary: A strange love triangle between Senor Gomez (Fred Armisen), Josefina (Jennifer Lopez), and Madelena (Kristen Wiig).

Transcript


Eternal Spark of Love
Summary: Narrator (Kenan Thompson) monitors a budding romance between office workers Sean (Jason Sudeikis) and Michelle (Jennifer Lopez).

Recurring Characters: Narrator.

Transcript


Jennifer Lopez performs "Starting Over"


Smash Mouth
Summary: Cecilia (Nasim Pedrad) can't sleep because the band Smash Mouth keeps performing in her room.

Transcript


Car Horns and More
Summary: Tina Tina Chaneuse (Jenny Slate) and cousin Kiki Dee Cheneuse (Jennifer Lopez) display a variety of talking car horns.

Recurring Characters: Tina Tina Cheneuse.

Transcript


Closet Organizer
Summary: Throw all of your loose closet items at the Closet Organizer guy (Will Forte) and he'll keep your closet straight for you.

Note: Repeat from 09m.


Goodnights
Transcript






Dress Rehearsal Cuts

Riley
Summary: Riley (Fred Armisen) calls more people a bitch.


Step Class
Summary: Step class instructor (Jennifer Lopez) turns into a werewolf when the full moon hits.


Anaconda
Summary: While on a date, Jennifer Lopez runs into a former "Anaconda" co-star (Andy Samberg), who's now a waiter and has a script he wants her to look at.



SNL Transcripts