Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 36: Episode 16

10p: Miley Cyrus / The Strokes


Declan/Good Looking Guy.....Andy Samberg
Friend.....Paul Brittain
Witch.....Nasim Pedrad
.....Miley Cyrus

Good Looking Guy: Should you vote for me just because I because Iím the rich, popular, good looking guy? Hell yeah! In this school looks are everything! Whatís the deal with the witch?

Friend: Stay clear, man. Sheís into some dark stuff.

Good Looking Guy: I love my good looks!

Witch: Well, I curse you to a life without them! You have one year to find someone to love you. Or stay like this forever!

Declan: Oh no! Iím beastly! Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

Miley Cyrus: Let me see your face.

Declan: Pretty gruesome, huh?

Miley Cyrus: Iíve seen worse.

Declan: Really?!

Miley Cyrus: No dude you look like ****. I misjudged you, Declan. Itís whats on the inside that counts- Ughh dude!

Declan: (naked, eating fried chicken from a bucket) What? Whatís up?

Miley Cyrus: Are you serious?!

Declan: I think I sat on some mashed potatoes!

(image of Miley Cyrus, with cast credit: "Miley Cyrus")

(image of Declan, with cast credit: "Gene Hackman")

Announcer: Beastly.

Declan: (holding up pregnancy stick) Iím pregnant and itís yours.

Miley Cyrus: Youíre a man and we havenít slept together.

Declan: Burn! Rango!

Miley Cyrus: Beastly!

Declan: Beastly!

Submitted by: Connor Cronholm

SNL Transcripts