Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 36: Episode 20

10t: Tina Fey / Ellie Goulding

Hallmark "Mother" Collection

Man.....Paul Brittain

[ open on Man addressing a Mother's Day card at his kitchen table ]

Announcer: It's Mother's Day. And there's no better way to express your feelings than Hallmark.

[ the man places the card in front of a vase of roses on the kitchen counter ]

Announcer: Because every mother is special -- but your mother is most special of all.

[ Mother enters the kitchen and picks up the card addressed to her ]

Announcer: Because it's you... in a dress.

[ reveal man dressed as his mother and smiling ]

Announcer: Introducing... the Hallmark "Mother" Collection. For weirdos. Because you're not just a good son... you're also a wonderful mother.

[ "Mother" hugs the homemade card, then places it on the refrigerator next to a lock of hair ]

Announcer: So show yourself you care. Because your mother will never leave you as long as you keep dressing like her... and talking like her... and being a good boy.

Because you're crazy -- about Mother.

The Hallmark "Mother" Collection. Available this Mother's Day.

[ fade ]

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