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75a: George Carlin / Billy Preston, Janis Ian
Jamitol

Written by: Michael O'Donoghue
Man #1 ... Chevy Chase
Man #2 ... Michael O'Donoghue
Announcer ...
[Two soft-spoken, casually-dressed men address the
camera, betraying not a trace of effeminacy. Man #1 is
tall. Man #2 is shorter, bespectacled and bearded.]
Man #1: This is my best friend, my business partner,
my advisor, my companion, my wife. And I love her.
She's quite a gal, you know. She takes care of the
house, cooks great meals, makes studded leather vests
at our own boutique, and still has enough energy to
give me the attention I need at the end of a long day.
I don't know how you do it.
Man #2: Well, I take care of myself. I get plenty of
rest, go to the Y, eat right and, to make sure I get
enough iron and vitamins, I take Jamitol every day.
[puts a pipe in his mouth]
Man #1: Makes me take it, too.
[Dissolve to two packages of the product (tablet and
liquid) and a large spoon.]
Announcer: Jamitol. More than twice the iron and
high-potency vitamins found in other supplements.
Tablet or liquid.
[Cut back to the two men. Man #2 takes the pipe out of
his mouth.]
Man #1: My wife. She's quite a gal. And I love her for
it.
[The two men glance at one another matter-of-factly,
as a husband and wife would, then look back at the
camera.]
Submitted Anonymously
SNL Transcripts
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