Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 1: Episode 5


This free script provided by http://javascriptkit.com












Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:



Special Guests:

No Film By:

Cameos:

Bit Players:


November 15th, 1975

Robert Klein

ABBA

Loudon Wainwright III

The Muppets

Albert Brooks

None

Michael O'Donoghue

Tom Davis

Al Franken

Neil Levy

Anne Beatts

Alan Zweibel



Season 1: Order Now!

Beauty Pageant
Summary: Southern Californian Sherry (Laraine Newman) has won the Miss America Beauty Pageant, but she refuses to accept her crown.

Recurring Characters: Sherry.


Montage
Note: Michael O'Donoghue is no longer credited as a Not Ready For Prime-Time Player, though he does appear in a non-speaking role during ABBA's performance.


Robert Klein's Monologue
Summary: Robert Klein does stand-up about animal stereotyping.

Bio: Robert Klein (1942-). Comedian; one of the early members of both Chicago's Second City troupe and the Improvisation club during the 1960's; starred in the CBS summer replacement series "Comedy Tonight" in 1970; minor film credits include: "The Owl & The Pussycat" (1970).

Also Hosted: 77j.


ABBA performs "S.O.S."
Summary: ABBA perform aboard the Titanic as the ship's Captain (Robert Klein) discovers a leak.

Bio: ABBA are the Swedish husband-and-wife teams of Benny Andersson & Anni-Frid "Frida" Lyngstad and Björn Ulvaeus & Agnetha Faltskog. Their group name is an acronym of the initials in their first names.

Lyrics


Pong
Summary: Al Franken & Tom Davis discuss their recent history midterm while playing Pong.

Transcript


Minute Mystery
Summary: Mexican detective Mike Mendoza (Dan Aykroyd) challenges viewers to solve a murder crime in under a minute.

Recurring Characters: Mike Mendoza.


Bee Centennial Minute
Summary: A bee (Garrett Morris) discusses his species' brush with Washington 200 years ago.

Recurring Characters: Bee.

Transcript


Loudon Wainwright III performs "Bicentennial"
Bio: Loudon Wainwright III (1947-). Humorous folk singer/songwriter; a descendant of colonial governor Peter Stuyvesant; son of Loudon S. Wainwright, Jr., who worked as a writer and editor for Life magazine; appeared recurringly as Capt. Calvin Spalding during the third season of "M*A*S*H"; he was once married to Kate McGarrigle, who often recorded his songs with her sister, Anna.

Lyrics


Greg Allman's Love Life
Summary: Greg Allman (Chevy Chase) tries to avoid giving a straight answer to the question "How's your love life?"

Transcript


Sam Peckinpah
Summary: Sam Peckinpah (John Belushi) treats an actress (Gilda Radner) roughly while directing a romantic-comedy scene.

Note: John Belushi proposed this sketch for the previous week's episode, whereby host Candice Bergan would have played Gilda Radner's part.

Note: Uses the same set as "Minute Mystery".

Transcript


Weekend Update with Chevy Chase
Summary: Chevy Chase makes faces at Frank Telinka (Dan Aykroyd) during his energy crisis warning.

Transcript


Jamitol
Summary: A husband (George Coe) uses the product to keep his wife (Jane Curtin) busy all day long.

Transcript


Exterminators
Summary: An exterminator (John Belushi) and his associate (Robert Klein) enter a basement to kill the roaches. Horrified at the prospect of harming one of God's creatures, the associate refers to the film, "The Eternal Crawl," which traces the triumpant existence of roaches throughout human history.


Fireman
Summary: Gilda Radner talks about how much she enjoys being a fireman, and offers some fire prevention tips.

Transcript


The Muppets
Summary: Scred tries to cure Ploobis' migraine headache.


Robert Klein
Summary: Robert Klein does stand-up about college life.

Transcript


K-Put's Price-Is-Rite Stamp Gun
Summary: Save thousands of dollars on groceries with this new device, which allows you to change the prices at the supermarket.

Transcript


Loudon Wainwright III performs "Unrequited to the Nth Degree"
Lyrics


Looks At Books
Summary: Elderly author Emily Litella (Gilda Radner) usesan excessive amount of repetitive adjectives while describing her book, "Little Kingdom", to Jane Curtin.

Recurring Characters: Emily Litella.


Ambassador Training Institute
Summary: A commercial spokesman (Andrew Duncan) explains how you can apply to become a U.S. ambassador for a foreign country, aptly mixing work with play.

Note: Repeat from 11/08/75.


Robert Klein & The SNL Band perform "I Can't Stop My Leg"
Transcript


ABBA performs "Waterloo"
Summary: The Titanic sinks as ABBA lip-synchs their performance onboard.

Lyrics


Goodnights
Transcript



SNL Transcripts