Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 1: Episode 15

This free script provided by

Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

A Film By:


Bit Players:

February 28th, 1976

Jill Clayburgh

Leon Redbone

The Singing Idlers

Andy Kaufman

Gary Weis

Edie Baskin

Lorne Michaels

William Wegman

Rosie Shuster

Alan Zweibel

Season 1: Order Now!

No More Falls
Summary: Tired of playing a buffoon on SNL, Chevy Chase tells Lorne Michaels he won't be doing any more falls for the show.



Jill Clayburgh's Monologue
Summary: Don Pardo's game-show descriptions accentuate Jill Clayburgh's story of her date with him.


Great Moments In Herstory I

Jill Carson, Guidance Counselor!

Leon Redbone performs "Ain't Misbehavin'"

White Guilt Relief Fund
Summary: Speaking as a representative of slavery, Garrett Morris says he'll be happy to accept guilt funds from white people everywhere.


Great Moments In Herstory II
Summary: Isadora Duncan (Jill Clayburgh) chooses a fateful scarf.


Weekend Update with Chevy Chase
Summary: Laraine Newman reports from a vacant New Hampshire a week after the Primary. Emily Litella (Gilda Radner) says she opposes the "deaf" penalty.

Recurring Characters: Emily Litella.


H & L Brock
Summary: Lowell Brock (John Belushi) and the H & L Brock tax team show how you can claim your home as a church and use it as a tax write-off.


The Singing Idlers perform "Semper Paratus"

Jill Clayburgh & The Singing Idlers perform "Sea Cruise"

Car Yummies

The Muppets
Summary: The Muppets couldn't be here this week, so Chevy Chase takes their place, using his bare hands to enact a scene titled "Paying the Milkman."


Gary Weis Film

Andy Kaufman
Summary: Andy Kaufman pulls up four members of the audience to lip-synch to an old recording of "Old MacDonald."


The Restaurant
Summary: While on a date, a woman (Jill Clayburgh) wonders what her boyfriend (Chevy Chase) is thinking about.


Summary: The three-blade razor is designed for people who'll believe anything they see.

Note: Repeat from 10/11/75.

Leon Redbone performs "Big Time Woman"

Great Moments In Herstory III

"The Mr. Bill Show"
Summary: In a film by home viewer Walter Williams, clayman Mr. Bill is tortured by Mr. Hands and Sluggo.


Grable & Lombard/Goodnights
Summary: Betty Grable (Jane Curtin) and Carole Lombard (Jill Clayburgh) are married in a new TV-movie sneak-peek.


SNL Transcripts