Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 1: Episode 19


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:

Bit Players:


May 8th, 1976

Madeline Kahn

Carly Simon

The Muppets

Gary Weis

Paul Shaffer

Howard Shore

Marilyn suzanne Miller



Season 1: Order Now!

Reagan's Hipness
Summary: Ronald Reagan (Chevy Chase) demonstrates his hipness by performing a piano piece and abusing a black musician (Garrett Morris).

Recurring Characters: Ronald Reagan.

Transcript


Montage


Madeline Kahn's Monologue


Wilderness Comedian
Summary: A Las Vegas comedian (John Belushi) performs his act for animals in the wild.

Transcript


Not For Ladies Only
Summary: Baba Wawa (Gilda Radner) and Marlene Dietrich (Madeline Kahn) have difficulty understanding each other during an interview.

Recurring Characters: Barbara Walters.

Transcript


Slumber Party
Summary: Girls (Madeline Kahn, Gilda Radner, Laraine Newman, Jane Curtain) discuss sex while at a slumber party.

Transcript


Namibia Fondue Sets
Summary: African native (Garrett Morris) makes a plea for unwanted fondue sets.

Transcript


The Muppets


"I Feel Pretty"
Summary: After being created, the Bride (Madeline Kahn) Of Frankenstein's Monster sings "I Feel Pretty."


Weekend Update with Chevy Chase
Summary: Emily Litella (Gilda Radner) sees nothing wrong with "violins" on television. Chevy Chase repeats the top story for cows.

Recurring Characters: Emily Litella.


Super-Absorbent Dry Hose


Carly Simon performs "Half a Chance" & "You're So Vain"
Note: Because Carly Simon was too shy to perform in front of a live audience, her musical appearance was pre-taped.

Note: One of the members of Carly Simon's band was unable to perform, so Chevy Chase grabbed a cowbell and took his place.


Final Days
Summary: Pat Nixon's (Madeline Kahn) diary entries chronicle Richard's (Dan Aykroyd) last days in office.

Recurring Characters: Pat Nixon, Richard Nixon, Julie Eisenhower, David Eisenhower, Henry Kissinger.

Note: The photo of Abraham Lincoln calls Richard Nixon a "dip" in the sketch, though, in the original script, he was to use the word "schmuck", which was censored because it was believed the viewing public associated the word with penis.

Transcript


Gary Weis Film
Summary: In a film by Gary Weis, Ray Charles' "New York's My Home" accompanies footage of sports fans around the city.


Chinatown


Imitations By Kahn
Summary: Madeline Kahn and Gilda Radner perform odd imitations.


Madeline Kahn performs "Lost In The Stars"


Goodnights



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