Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 2: Episode 7

76g: Dick Cavett / Ry Cooder


.....Gilda Radner
.....Garrett Morris

[ open on Gilda Radner, dressed in vivid, multicolored clothing, make-up, and accessories, smiling before the camera ]

Announcer: And now, Gilda Radner speaks out for Chroma-Trak.

Gilda Radner: My hair... is red! My eyes... are blue! My scarf... is yellow! The people at Chroma-Trak paid me a LOT of money to tell you that my top... is green!

[ cut to Garrett Morris watching in his living room, confused that the colors Gilda describes don't match what's on his TV screen ]

Garrett Morris: Green?!

Gilda Radner: My belt... is black! My gloves... are brown!

[ Garrett frantically begins to twist the Tint knob on his set, making Gilda turn a variety of other colors and shades ]

Garrett Morris: I just paid $600 for this thing...!

Gilda Radner: My bracelets... are orange...

[ Garrett flips the set off, then on again, while yelling at it ]

Gilda Radner: ... purple... yellow... brown...

Garrett Morris: I don't see anything!!

[ Garrett begins to smack the sides of his TV st, causing Gilda to jump around inside the image ]

Garrett Morris: $600!! $600!!

[ Garrett finally smacks the top of the TV, causing Gilda to fall out of the image to the floor in a manner similar to how Chevy Chase used to open the show each week ]

[ Gilda finally stands up within the TV screen, as the image dissolves to Gilda on the SNL stage ]

Gilda Radner: "Live, from New York, it's Saturday Night!"

SNL Transcripts