Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 3: Episode 5



77e: Ray Charles

Goodnights

... Ray Charles

[Home Base. Ray Charles seated at the grand piano surrounded by the cast, the Raylettes, and original members of his band.]

Ray Charles: You know, I - I - I'm so glad. I-- They - They just told me that - that, uh, we've got a whole minute left, you know. That's - That's highly unusual for this show. But, this is straight ahead. Before we - we get too lost here, everybody that's around me, I really want to say, uh, truly, uh, thanks to all of you, people. And, uh - and, uh - would you all just say a nice, uh, "thank you and good night" and then what I want to do is - is just sort of, uh, get into, uh-- C-Can we just close with a - with a little somethin' a little more lively than the band and just let them sort of follow us, like, uh... [plays a funky uptempo rhythm on the piano and scats along, soon the band joins in and everyone claps to the beat, credits roll - Brother Ray sings:] Here on Saturday night, Saturday night ...

Don Pardo V/O: Mr. Mike is played by Michael O'Donoghue. Next Saturday night, our host will be Buck Henry with musical guest Leon Redbone and the five finalists in the "Anyone Can Host" contest. Boy, I hope they don't have an "Anyone Can Announce" contest. Nah! They wouldn't do that to me. This is Don Pardo saying good night ... anyone!

Ray Charles: [sings]
Wanna have a little fun, y'all
On Saturday night
That's where it all begun, y'all
On Saturday night
Tell me! Whatcha gonna do ...?


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SNL Transcripts

Ray Charles' Monologue



Ray Charles' Monologue

... Ray Charles


Don Pardo V/O: Ladies and gentlemen, Ray Charles!

[Applause. Darkened Home Base. In a spotlight, Ray Charles sits at a grand piano.]

Ray Charles: Aw, thank you. Thank you, thank you very-- Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. Uh, I want to say that when the people, uh, from Saturday Night first asked me to, uh, host this show, of course, I - I - I said "Absolutely not." Uh, I - I knew the show was tasteless and - and offensive and - and - and there was no way I was gonna let thirty years of a career go down the drain. I - I - I might be blind but I'm certainly not stupid. But they - they - they kept on askin' me and the producer was saying, "Hey, hey, Ray, you know, we gonna make you look good." And - and-- But, you see, I was worried more about the sound. So, I - I - eventually, I said, "Listen, I'll tell you what. Er, uh, I'll do the show but - but - er, uh - there must be some, uh, particular conditions in order for me to do it. Ah, for instance, I've got to have my own musicians. I - I want the Raylettes. And they said, "Okay." But for the last thing I asked 'em about, it took 'em a little while to come up with it but they were even able to do that, too. So, therefore, ladies and gentlemen, let me say that: [grandly] Tonight, we are proud to be coming to you live -- from Carnegie Hall!

[lowers his voice conspiratorially] Now, listen, I, uh, I gotta tell you something. [chuckles] You see, now, they think that I think that this is Carnegie Hall but... [laughter and applause] ... You see, but, ah, the joke is really on them because, you see, I - I'm not the real Ray Charles. The real Ray Charles IS at Carnegie Hall. Ah, but if he were here tonight, I - I am sure that he would lead off this show with somethin' like this. One! Two!

[Charles' band comes crashing in and the lights come up to reveal a stage full of musicians and numerous female backing vocalists, the Raylettes. They all launch into a swinging, soulful version of "I Can See Clearly Now" ...]


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SNL Transcripts