Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 3: Episode 11







77k: Robert Klein / Bonnie Raitt

Rock Concert

Written by: Michael O'Donoghue

Don Kirshner.....Paul Shaffer
Tina Turner.....Garrrett Morris
Mr. Mike.....Michael O'Donoghue
Mikettes.....Gilda Radner, Jane Curtin, Laraine Newman

Announcer: "Charlie's Angels Catch The Syph" will not be seen tonight, so NBC can present this special program.

[ open on Don Kirshner sitting in his chair above the studio ]

Don Kirshner: I'm Don Kirshner, and welcome to "Rock Concert." Tonight we have a group that's been at the forefront of the R&B/Rythym and Blues scene for a long time. Today, with the help of Dean Lusten, Mo Anthony, and the staff of Celectric Records, their manager Morie Daniels, and the whole rock division of the promotion department of ICM, they continue to be as strong a creative force as ever. Let us join Tina Turner, Mr. Mike and the Mikettes, for the "Mr. Mike and Tina Turner Review."

[ dissolve to Tina Turner on stage below ]

Tina Turner: Every now and then, we like to do something nice.. and easy. Only there's just one thing: we never do anything nice.. and easy. We only do it nice.. and rough. We're gonna go over turn to this song by Mr. Mike, "Nice.. And Easy" and we're gonna finish.. rough. This is how we do "Proud Mary."

Mikettes and Tina: [ singing ]
"Do do do do do do
do do do do do do.."


Mr. Mike: [ sitting on stool with guitar ] This is the story. This rabbit works at a factory. All of the other rabbits have had their ears amputated so they won't get caught in the machinery. But this one rabbit's really vain, and doesn't want his ears amputated. So he's working on the line, and he gets his ears caught in a big wheel.

Mikettes and Tina: [ singing ]
"Big wheel keep on turning
All night!"


Mr. Mike: By the time they pulled him out of the wheel, he looked like tomato bisque. Tina?

Tina Turner: That's wasn't a very nice story, Mr. Mike.

Mr. Mike: I'm not a very nice guy, Tina.

Tina Turner: You see, every time I try to do something nice.. and easy, Mr. Mike makes me do it.. rough. See, we can never ever do nothing nice.. and easy. We always do it.. rough!

[ singing ]
"Let's have a good time in the city Working for the man every night and day I have never lost one pretty instant Worried 'bout the man taking that away!"

Mikettes and Tina:
"'Cause the big wheel keep on turnin'
For miles, we're gonna keep on burnin'!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Mikettes and Tina:
"Ooo ooo ooo ooo
Ooo ooo ooo ooo!"


Tina Turner:
"If you come down to the river
Bet ya gonna find some people who live
You don't have to worry
If ya have the money
You'll find the people there are happy to give!"


Mikettes and Tina:
"'Cause the big wheel keep on turnin'
For miles, we're gonna keep on burnin'!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!"

Tina Turner:
"Roll it!"

Mikettes:
"Roll it!
Roll it down the river!"


Tina:
Aaaaahhhh!!!

[ a triumphant finish, as the camera dissolves back to Don Kirshner in the booth above ]

Don Kirshner: "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night."


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