Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 3: Episode 17





77q: Michael Sarrazin / Keith Jarrett, Gravity

Michael Sarrazin's Monologue

.....Michael Sarrazin

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen -- Michael Sarrazin!

Michael Sarrazin: I'm really happy to be here. You know, at first I was a bit apprehensive to do a show like this. I mean, I've done a lot of movies, but this is a totally different experience for me. But everybody's been real nice around here -- even though a lot of them have been busy doing their tax returns, and, well, nobody's real happy around tax time, are they? I'm also a little bit nervous about doing this show tonight because April 15th -- besides being tax day -- is the 66th anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic. [ some audience members clap ] Another good omen, huh? But worst of all -- it's also Booth Day. Now, probably, a lot of you don't know about Booth Day. April 15th is the day that Abraham Lincoln died. He was, of course, shot by John Wilkes Booth... [ a beat ] an actor. [ the audience laughs ] Yeah. Well, Booth gave us actors a very bad reputation. You know, it's a superstition in the theater that Booth Day will be a bad luck day in the theater until a president assassinates an actor. But I think we're safe. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that this Booth Day will be an exception, and that nothing will go wrong.

So! We'll be right back!


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