Saturday Night Live Transcripts
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Season 5: Episode 1
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 Air Date:
Host:
Musical Guest:
Special Guests:
Cameos:
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October 13th, 1979
Steve Martin
Blondie
Don Novello
Tom Gammill
Al Franken
Tom Davis
Peter Aykroyd
Jim Downey
Andy Murphy
Tom Schiller
Buck Henry
Paul Shaffer
Harry Shearer
Max Pross
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The Pope at Monsterdome
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Summary: Pope John Paul II's (Steve Martin) doorman (Garrett Morris) turns clergy away during his visit to the Monsterdome.
Recurring Characters: Jerry Aldini, Pope John Paul II.
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Steve Martin's Monologue
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Summary: Steve Martin dances along to "Stompin' At The Savoy" while encompassed by strobe lights.
Also Hosted: 76e, 76n, 77a, 77i, 77r, 78d, 79s, 86f, 87a, 88t, 91i, 94a, 05l.
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Craig's Traveler's Checks
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Summary: You can enjoy a worry-free vacation even if you lose Craig's (Jim Downey) Traveler's Checks, because he never leaves his apartment.
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Spanish Tutor
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Summary: A Spanish tutor (Steve Martin) gives lessons on a door-to-door basis.
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The Vandals
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Summary: A Centurion (Steve Martin) confronts a juvenile delinquent Vandal (Al Franken) caught in the act by his guards.
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Blondie performs "Dreaming"
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Rise
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Summary: Steve Martin demonstrates how he avoids bathroom germs by hovering above the toilet.
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Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Bill Murray
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Summary: Father Guido Sarducci (Don Novello) shows off his Pope merchandise and announces his Find the Popes in the Pizza contest.
Recurring Characters: Father Guido Sarducci.
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Great Moments In Rock History
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Summary: Carole King (Laraine Newman) sings "You've Got a Friend", while her own friend (Steve Martin) is mugged in front of her apartment.
Recurring Characters: Don Kirschner.
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The David Susskind Show
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Recurring Characters: David Susskind, Audrey Peart Dickman.
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Blondie performs "The Hardest Part"
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The All New Mr. Bill Show
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Summary: In an attempt to host an all-new show without Mr. Hands, Mr. Bill redecorates with a disco ball and shows filmed footage of his disastrous summer on the beach.
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What The Hell Is That?
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Summary: A pair of wandering tourists (Steve Martin, Bill Murray) gaze toward the studio audience and wonder what it is they're looking at.
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SNL Transcripts
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