Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 5: Episode 5

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


November 17th, 1979

Bea Arthur

The Roches


Andy Kaufman

Reagan's Nap Schedule
Summary: Ronald Reagan's advisor (Harry Shearer) runs down his schedule as (Laraine Newman) removes his make-up.



Bea Arthur's Monologue
Summary: Bea Arthur gets pianist Paul Shaffer's heart racing with a rendition of "Let Me Love You".


Spud Beer
Summary: The beer of choice among boat people with no place to go.

First He Cries
Summary: When Irene (Gilda Radner) loses a breast due to cancer, the aftermath is hardest on her husband Larry (Bill Murray).


Drop Out
Summary: When Tommy (Tom Davis) declares he doesn't feel like going to school, his dad (Bill Murray) decides to show him and stays home from work, thus setting off a chain reaction that results in the Soviets taking over America.


The Roches perform "Bobby's Song"

Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Bill Murray
Summary: Science editor Dr. Al Franken experiments with cruel and unusual ways to kill cockroaches.


Aunt Judy's Basement
Summary: During Thanksgiving dinner at Aunt Judy's (Bea Arthur), adult siblings and cousins (Jane Curtin, Laraine Newman, Bill Murray, Paul Shaffer) continue to be relegated to the kiddie table in the basement and act in an appropriately childish manner.


Woman To Woman
Summary: Ultra-feminist Connie Carson (Gilda Radner) tries to discredit her elderly guest (Bea Arthur) for having raised perfect children while still managing a satisfactory in-home career.

Recurring Characters: Connie Carson.


Summary: Tom Clay (Harry Shearer) recalled government products being offered for a fraction of the original costs.

Recurring Characters: Tom Clay.


Backer's Audition
Summary: Musicians Teddy Naddler (Harry Shearer) and Andrew Mazelle (Paul Shaffer) sell a group of backers on the idea of financing a Broadway rock-musical about Charles Manson.


Mr. Bill Builds A House
Summary: In a film by Walter Williams, Mr. Bill encounters construction mishaps at the hands of Mr. Hands and Sluggo the insurance agent.


Los Beatolos Cubanos
Summary: Latin band (Pater Aykroyd, Garrett Morris, Tom Schiller, Paul Shaffer) performs their own version of Beatles hits.

Andy Kaufman Preview
Summary: Andy Kaufman announces his challenge to have a woman wrestle him on SNL's Christmas show.


The Roches performs "Hallelujah Chorus"


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