Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 6: Episode 5










80e: David Carradine / The cast of The Pirates of Penzance

Dylan & Guthrie

Nurse.....Ann Risley
Woody Guthrie.....David Carradine
Bob Dylan.....Patrick Weathers

[ open on interior, Woody Guthrie's hospital room, as Guthrie strums his guitar ]

Nurse: [ entering ] Excuse me. Excuse me, Mr. Guthrie, but that young Mr. Dylan is here to see you. Now, would you like me to tell him to leave?

Woody Guthrie: Nahhh. Send the kid in.

Nurse: Okay, okay...

Woody Guthrie: He makes me laugh, you know? It take a lot to laugh. It takes a train to cry.

Nurse: That's right. [ calling into the hallway ] Okay, you can come in.

[ Bob Dylan saunters in with his guitar ]

Bob Dylan: Hey! Hey, Woody Guthrie, I wrote you a song!

Nurse: Please, please. Quiet, please. This is a hospital.

[ the Nurse exits the room ]

Bob Dylan: Gee whiz! I didn't mean to upset your nurse none.

Woody Guthrie: Aww, that's just like a woman, kid! But don't think twice, it's alright.

[ Dylan writes these sage words across the top of his guitar ]

Woody Guthrie: What are you doing, writing a book?

Bob Dylan: Don't mind me, Woody -- just keep on a-talking.

Woody Guthrie: Ah, yeah. Well... I'm just blowing in the wind these days. Hell, I feel like I'm a-knock-knock-knocking on Heaven's door. But I don't know, I... I just keep hoping I shall be released.

Bob Dylan: Hmm...

Woody Guthrie: It's like I was saying to Mick Jagger the other day: I can't get no... satisfaction!

Bob Dylan: Who?

Woody Guthrie: You don't know him, he's a complete unknown. He's like a... rolling stone.

Bob Dylan: Yeah. I can relate to that. I'm a complete unknown, no direction home.

Woody Guthrie: Like a rolling stone?

Bob Dylan: Yeah.

Woody Guthrie: How does it feel?

Bob Dylan: It's alright.

Woody Guthrie: Hey, that's right! I said that to Ray Charles just the other day. [ he pauses ] What'd I say?

Bob Dylan: It's alright.

Woody Guthrie: Yeah! It's alright! I said it to him a whole BUNCH of times!

Bob Dylan: Yeah. Hey, Woody, uh -- listen to this song I wrote for you here. [ he strums his guitar ands sings ] "Hey, hey, Woody Guthrie, I wrote you a song." What you think?

Woody Guthrie: Well, kid, you may not have much as a writer, but, uh... you got a great VOICE! Listen, do it more like this. Uh -- [ strumming and singing ] "Heyyyy, Woody Guthrie, I wrote you a SONG!"

Bob Dylan: [ enunciating ] "I wrote you a SONG!"

Woody Guthrie: Yeah! Yeah!

[ the Nurse re-enters, appalled ]

Nurse: I don't believe you!

Woody Guthrie: It ain't me, babe! Oh, no, no, no, it ain't me!

Nurse: Well, I'm sorry, but it's time for your sedative.

Woody Guthrie: [ to Dylan ] Ah, you see, kid? They'll stone you when you're playing your guitar.

[ Dylan writes this down ]

Nurse: Well, you must not feel so all alone. Everybody must get stoned, as you put it.

Bob Dylan: Hey. Can I stick around and see if he talks in his sleep?

Nurse: Now, look -- lights out an hour early tonight. Remember, it's Daylight Savings.

[ the nurse exits the room ]

Woody Guthrie: Well, kid --

Together: The times, they are a-changing!

[ the camera pulls out on the set, with SUPER: "Coming Up: The Immoral Minority" ]

[ fade ]


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