
Saturday Night Live Transcripts

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Season 6: Episode 8

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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:



Special Guests:

Cameos:
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January 24th, 1981

Robert Hays

14 Karat Soul

Joe 'King' Carrasco & The Crowns

None

Michael Nesmith

Harry Osborne
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America Not Held Hostage Anymore
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Summary: Despite the safe return of the American hostages in Iran, Ted Kopel (Joe Piscopo) finds a way to harass further information out of a hostage's wife (Ann Risley).

Recurring Characters: Ted Koppel.

Transcript
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Robert Hays' Monologue
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Summary: Robert Hays manipulates SNL's instant Neilsen ratings by spicing up the variety of his topics.

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Dazola
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Summary: A Native American (Denny Dillon) speaks highly of the mushroom spread.
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Love American Style
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Summary: In a parody of the inflatable co-pilot in "Airplane!", actor Robert Hays finds himself alone in a hotel room with a blow-up prostitute.

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Saturday Night Live Sports Central
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Summary: Sports Reporter Joe Piscopo profiles the Asteroids lifestyle of video game pro Eddie Atari (Eddie Murphy).
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Reaganco
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Summary: Spokesman (Charles Rocket) pitches the Reagan touch to common, everyday household products.
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Save-A-Network Telethon
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Summary: Pledge a premise to help keep NBC on the air. Please!
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Pre-Superbowl Pre-Game Preview
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Summary: Panel members (Robert Hays, Charles Rocket, Ann Risley) make tomorrow's Super Bowl sound like the most important event in the history of mankind.

Transcript
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"The Foreign Film"
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Summary: In a film by William Dear, a man (Michael Nesmith) speaks complete and utter nonsense.
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Sports Organist at a Funeral
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Summary: Sports organist Harry Osborne is a last-minute fill-in at a solemn funeral service.
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Weekend Update with Charles Rocket & Gail Matthius
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Summary: Fashion expert (Ann Risley) Tiffany Fleur emcees a fashion show for engineering students. Joe Piscopo uses an electronic football game to predict the outcome of tomorrow's Super Bowl. Eddie Murphy comments on Irans' frozen assets, and how it relates to his personal loss of $80 in a dope deal gone wrong.

Transcript
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Disco Meltdown
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Summary: Dena Disco (Denny Dillon) shakes her groove thing at a nuclear plant's disco club.
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The Rocket Report
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Summary: Charles Rocket breaks down Ronald Reagan's daily itinerary.
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The Pacesetter
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Summary: Spokesman (Joe Piscopo) demonstrates his product's ability to bring new life to amateur theater.
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Ravi Sings
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Summary: Ravi Shankar (Patrick Weathers) sings his own version of popular American romantic ballads.
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Roweena's Cut 'n' Curl
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Summary: Nadine (Denny Dillon) and Roweena (Gail Matthius) have different opinions about President Reagan.

Recurring Characters: Nadine, Roweena.
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Eddie's Promotion
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Summary: A smug Eddie Murphy insists that his promotion to full cast member won't go to his head.
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Dream Date
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Summary: Spokesman (Charles Rocket) tells viewers to send in $40,000 for a chance at a Dream Date.
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"Ordinary Elephant People"
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Summary: A preview for a new movie about a disfigured dysfunctional family.
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14 Karat Soul performs "I Wish That We Were Married"
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14 Karat Soul performs "This Time It's For Real"
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National Enquirer Editors
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Summary: Various editors for the National Enquirer make decisions about the contents of the upcoming issue.
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Joe 'King' Carrasco & The Crowns performs "Don't Bug Me Baby"
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SNL Transcripts
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