Hedley & Wyche

Spokesman.....Mike Myers
Pub Owner.....Phil Hartman
Barmaid.....Julia Sweeney
Bobby.....Kevin Nealon
Pub Patron.....Chris Farley



[ open in British pub ]

Spokesman: You like our pubs, and you like our fish and chips. And I'm about to let you in on another secret - Hedley & Wyche.

Pub Owner: It's the only toothpaste we ever use! [ smiles, revealing poorly-cared for teeth ]

Barmaid: One tube last for years! [ smiles with rotten teeth ]

Bobby: Actually, I've used it all my life, and I've never had to go to a dentist. [ smiles with rotten teeth ]

Spokesman: Hedley & Wyche, is the toothpaste that makes brushing a pleasure. That's because its mild cleaning agent is enhanced by two teaspoons of pure cane sugar, for a smile that says "Yum, that was good!"

Pub Patron: And it tastes great on a cracker!

Jingle: "Hedley & Wyche
The British toothpaste!
It tastes okay
And it's got great taste!"


Spokesman: Hedley & Wyche. The British toothpaste. You don't have to brush your teeth every week - but you just might want to!

Announcer: Hedley & Wyche. For a smile that says, "Yum, that was good!"


SNL Transcripts