Saturday Night Live Transcripts
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Season 17: Episode 17
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 Air Date:
Host:
Musical Guest:
Special Guests:
Cameos:
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April 11th, 1992
Sharon Stone
Pearl Jam
None
Lorne Michaels
Tom Davis
Jim Downey
Warren Hutcherson
Robert Smigel
Terry Turner
Fred Wolf
Jon Lovitz
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Wayne's World
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Summary: Wayne (Mike Myers) and Garth (Dana Carvey) cast their picks for the Best & Worst moments at this year's Oscars ceremony.
Recurring Characters: Wayne Campbell, Garth Algar.
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Sharon Stone's Monologue
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Summary: Dressed in her "Basic Instinct" garb, Sharon Stone sits on a chair at Home Base as men throughout the studio eagerly wait for an illicit peek under her dress.
Transcript
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Jiffy Pop Airbag
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Summary: Now you can enjoy a delicious snack while you wait for the ambulance to arrive at the scene of your next accident.
Note: Repeat from 02/15/92.
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Hitting on Women
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Summary: Two grown men (Chris Farley, Adam Sandler) can't form the words to ask out an attractive woman (Sharon Stone) at a bar.
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Sex Games
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Summary: Dan (Kevin Nealon) doesn't quite get the hang of participating in a sexual fantasy with his wife (Sharon Stone).
Transcript
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Flippy, The Flipping Chihuahua
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Summary: Flippy, The Flipping Chihuahua is run over by Toonces the Driving Cat.
Recurring Characters: Toonces the Driving Cat.
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Lung Brush
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Summary: Don't stop smoking - clean your lungs instead.
Note: Repeat from 11/02/91.
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Pat's Interrogation
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Summary: Though androgynous Pat (Julia Sweeney) endures a "Basic Instinct" interrogation process, the mysterious gender isn't revealed.
Recurring Characters: Pat.
Transcript
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Pearl Jam performs "Alive"
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Also Performed: 93q, 05p.
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Weekend Update with Kevin Nealon
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Summary: Rob Schneider's commentary on the environment reveals the answers he was given while conducting a door-to-door poll. Queen Shenequa (Ellen Cleghorne) declares that she won't be paying her taxes this year because she's a black woman. Victoria Jackson's commentary about the Democratic Party is sidetracked so can sing "I Love A Cop."
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Airport Security Check
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Summary: Suspecting an attractive woman (Sharon Stone) of being a terrorist, male security officers (Kevin Nealon, Dana Carvey, Rob Schneider) fake alarm notices and make her remove articles of clothing.
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Ernie's
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Summary: Ernie (Chris Rock) insults his wife (Ellen Cleghorne) with ridiculously long descriptions.
Transcript
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Tayster's Choice Spermicidal Jelly I
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Summary: A man's (Dana Carvey) neighbor (Sharon Stone) bcomes to his door to borrow the product.
Transcript
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Phil Hartman Creations
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Summary: Phil Hartman shows off some of the wigs he's worn on SNL over the years.
Transcript
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Tayster's Choice Spermicidal Jelly II
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Summary: A man's (Dana Carvey) neighbor (Sharon Stone) returns the product to his apartment while he's entertaining another woman (Julia Sweeney).
Transcript
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Pearl Jam performs "Porch"
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The Porno Couple
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Summary: A man (Phil Hartman) and his fiancee (Sharon Stone) admit that the real nature of their lives involves excessive amounts of pornography.
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Tayster's Choice Spermicidal Jelly III
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Summary: A man (Dana Carvey) again meets his neighbor (Sharon Stone) at her sister's (Victoria Jackson) apartment.
Transcript
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SNL Transcripts
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