Ass Don't Smell

Bob.....Kevin Nealon
Male Co-Worker #1.....Rob Schneider
Male Co-Worker #2.....David Spade
Male Co-Worker #3.....Tim Meadows



Bob: Let me bring you up to date on the Civic Center project..

Male Co-Worker #1: [ sniffing the air ] Did somebody step in something?

Bob: I had Ted draw these up over the weekend..

Male Co-Worker #1: Oh, come on! Doesn't anybody else smell it?

[ turns around and disgusts tow other co-workers with the smell from his ass ]

Bob: I think we've finally solved the underground garage problem..

Male Co-Worker #1: I'm sorry. I can't concentrate. Can't we do this over the phone?

Male Co-Worker #2: Yes!

[ everyone leaves the office, leaving confused ]

[ SUPER: The Next Day ]

Bob: [ notices Ass Don't Smell canister on his desk ] Ass Don't Smell? [ thinking ] Hmm.. maybe osmebody's trying to tell me something..

Announcer: Scrubbing doesn't work; perfumes only cover it up; and who has the time to soak? Forget all that junk, and step up to Ass Don't Smell.

[ SUPER: A Week Later ]

Male Co-Worker #3: Hey, Bob! Congratulations on the Civic Center project!

Bob: Thanks!

Male Co-Worker #3: [ notices canister in Bob's locker ] Huh? Ass Don't Smell? But your ass doesn't smell.

Bob: [ smiling confidently ] Exactly.

Announcer: Ass Don't Smell. The name says it all. Now, in new tamper-proof package.


SNL Transcripts