Clinton Inaugural Gala Barbra Streisand.....Mike Myers Whoopi Goldberg.....Ellen Cleghorne President Bill Clinton.....Phil Hartman Hillary Clinton.....Jan Hooks Chelsea Clinton.....Julia Sweeney [ open on the Clinton Inaugural Gala, Barbra Streisand finishing the song "People". ] Whoopi Goldberg: Barbra Streisand, ladies and gentlemen! Yeah! give it up! This is so nice - this is all for you, Mr. President! Inauguration! Now it's a new beginning, because it's like, Bush - he didn't know, because we was saying, "The people are hungry!" and he was saying, "Barbera, where's the dog?" You dig, you know? Alright! now, we got a psecial surprise for you - all the way from.. well, I don't know where she come from, but you know the sister is bad! And she's here tonight, for you! Ladies and gentlemen, Madonna! Madonna: Mr. President.. this is for you. [ whispers in song ] "Happy.. Inauguration.. to you." [ Clinton claps wildly ] "Happy.. Inauguration.. to you." [ Hillary fumes ] "Happy Inauguration, Mr.. Pwesident." [ Clinton has a huge smile on his face; Hillary is angry, Chelsea is confused ] "Happy.. Inauguration.. to you." [ Clinton and Hillary are now fighting over the personal tribute ] "How.. old.. are.. you now?" [ Clinton smiles, as Hillary fumes some more ] "How.. old.. are.. you now?" [ Hillary gets up to leave, as Clinton persuades her to stay ] "How.. old.. are.. you, Mr.. Pwesident?" [ Clinton holds Hillary in his arms, while giving the "Call Me!" signal to Madonna ] "How.. old.. are.. you now?" [ audience gives a standing ovation ] [ Clinton gives Madonna the "Call Me!" signal again, but she shakes hr fingers "No, no", and acknowledges Chelsea instead, who is pleasantly surprised by the outcome ] Madonna: "Live, from New York, it's Saturday Night!" SNL Transcripts