Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 18: Episode 17


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:


April 10th, 1993

Jason Alexander

Peter Gabriel

None

Lorne Michaels

Warren Hutcherson

Clinton-Yeltsin Summit
Summary: President Bill Clinton (Phil Hartman) makes an indecent proposal to Boris Yeltisn (Chris Farley) - $1.6 billion in foreign aid for one night with Naina Yeltsin (Julia Sweeney).

Recurring Characters: President Bill Clinton, George Stephanopolous.


Montage


Jason Alexander's Monologue
Summary: Broadway veteran Jason Alexander wants to put on an old-time showstopping musical number for the audience, but SNL's low production values only allow him to hover from a string as the clouds fly past him.


Jiffy Express
Summary: The couriers at Jiffy Express can backdate packages in order to shift the blame from lazy senders.

Note: Repeat from 10/24/92.


Woody Allen Fan Club
Summary: The members (Jason Alexander, Kevin Nealon, Rob Schneider, David Spade, Rob Smigel) of the Woody Allen Fan Club meet to discuss their idol's personal trouble and legal mishaps.


Deep Thoughts
Summary: Jack Handey ponders the idea that laughter is the best medicine.

Transcript


Hub's Gyros
Summary: A patron (Jason Alexander) wants more juice for his gyro, sparking intense interest from the staff at Hub's Gyros.

Recurring Characters: Hub, Helios.

Transcript


Peter Gabriel performs "Steam"


Weekend Update with Kevin Nealon
Summary: Bennett Brauer (Chris Farley) uses quotes-signs while describing his offbeat personality to the audience.

Recurring Characters: Bennett Brauer.


Food Union Break Room
Summary: Mark's (Jason Alexander) quest to introduce a break room sanctuary to new hire Andy (Rob Schneider) proves fruitless, as their privacy is invaded by a customer (Julia Sweeney), their manager (Phil Hartman), and co-worker Canteen Boy (Adam Sandler).

Recurring Characters: Canteen Boy.

Transcript


Deep Thoughts
Summary: Jack Handey expresses a single wish for when Earth is conquered by the Martians.

Transcript


Mr. DeAngelo
Summary: Mob boss Mr. DeAngelo (Jason Alexander) talks tough to Marcus (Tim Meadows), the punk who crossed him, when his henchmen (Phil Hartman, Kevin Nealon) hold him down, but the roles are reversed once the strongarms let go.


Ignorant Proposal
Summary: In the black version of "Indecent Proposal", the high stakes are lowered accordingly.

Recurring Characters: Billy Dee Williams, Eddie Murphy.


Deep Thoughts
Summary: Jack Handey ponders what frightens ants the most.


Tales of Irony
Summary: Three ironic tales bear little to no irony whatsoever.


Deep Thoughts
Summary: Jack Handey ponders the lifelessness of the desert.

Transcript


Peter Gabriel performs "In Your Eyes"


Black Co-Workers
Summary: Jeff (Jason Alexander) runs into more and more trouble when he continually confuses his black co-workers for one another.

Transcript


Goodnights
Transcript



SNL Transcripts