Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 20: Episode 1


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


September 24th, 1994

Steve Martin

Eric Clapton

Brian Austin Green

Roger Clemens

Bobby Bonilla

Jack McDowell

Clinton Auditions
Summary: Chris Farley, David Spade, Chis Elliot, Adam Sandler and Tim Meadows resort to standard shtick in their auditions for the President Bill Clinton impression after Phil Hartman leaves "SNL."

Recurring Characters: President Bill Clinton.

Transcript


Montage


Steve Martin's Monologue
Summary: After his joke about the many soups at the supermarket, Steve Martin steps outside of himself to examine what went wrong.

Also Hosted: 76e, 76n, 77a, 77i, 77r, 78d, 79a, 79s, 86f, 87a, 88t, 91i, 05l.

Transcript


H.H.T. Home Headache Test
Summary: Take a simple test to find out if you really have a headache.

Transcript


Court TV
Summary: Scattered highlights of the O.J. Simpson (Tim Meadows) trial.

Recurring Characters: Terry Moran, O.J. Simpson.

Transcript


Steve Martin's All-Natural Penis Beauty Cream
Summary: The formula Steve Martin uses to keep his penis shiny and beautiful.

Recurring Characters: Terry Moran, O.J. Simpson.

Transcript


Total Bastard Airlines II
Summary: Transferred to new flight, Steward (David Spade) is still a jerk.

Recurring Characters: Steward.


Eric Clapton performs "I'm Tore Down"


Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald
Summary: Laura Kightlinger relates some recent life lessons she's learned. Rock critic Gil Graham (Adam Sandler) disccuses recent concerts he attended.

Recurring Characters: Gil Graham.

Transcript


The Ron Wood Show
Summary: Mumbling Ron Wood (Mike Myers) covers little ground in interviews.

Recurring Characters: Ron Wood, Whoopi Goldberg.


Buck Daniels
Summary: Country singer (Michael McKean) puts the life of Buck Daniels (Steve Martin) into song.

Transcript


Nut-Rific Ad Campaign
Summary: Poor lyric choice gives candy bar jingle a negative flavor.

Recurring Characters: Gil Graham.

Transcript


Eric Clapton performs "Five Long Years"


Super Sports Tours
Summary: Striking baseball players will make appearances on an exciting cruise.

Transcript


Babies
Summary: Parents (Chris Farley, Janene Garafalo) compare babies with other couple.

Transcript


Goodnights
Transcript



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