Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 21: Episode 4


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:


October 28th, 1995

Gabriel Byrne

Alanis Morrisette

None

Bill Bradley

Lamar Alexander

Colin Quinn

Cheryl Hardwick

Lorne Michaels

Chipper Jones

Chrissy Hynde

Mark Wohlers

Tom Glavine

Paula Pell

Halloween in New Hampshire
Summary: Republican Presidential hopefuls harass a suburban homeowner in New Hampshire on her doorstep on Halloween night.

Recurring Characters: Bob Dole, Phil Gramm, Bill Clinton, Ross Perot.

Transcript


Montage


Gabriel Byrne's Monologue
Summary: As Gabriel Byrne explains that he won't be mocked by the usual Irish stereotypes, a liquor bottle (Fred Wolf) and a potato (Colin Quinn) dance behind his back.


Marshall Power Tools
Summary: John Marshall, Jr. (David Koechner) and his family members make great use of their power tools, despite their lack of body parts.

Transcript


Mary Katherine Gallagher
Summary: Excitable Mary Katherine Gallagher (Molly Shannon) auditions for school talent show.

Recurring Characters: Mary Katherine Gallagher.

Transcript


Cooking With Keith
Summary: A stoned Keith Richards (Gabriel Byrne) hosts a cooking show with a little help from a pair of bimbos.

Recurring Characters: Keith Richards.

Transcript


Alanis Morissette performs "Hand In My Pocket"


Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald
Summary: Phil Donahue (Darrell Hammond) finds that he's easily overlooked thanks to Sally Jesse Raphael. Cheri Oteri acts immature with Molly Shannon, David Spade and Norm MacDonald during her editorial.

Recurring Characters: Phil Donahue.


Miracles of Genetics
Summary: A doctor (Gabriel Byrne) who specializes in genetics introduces prospective parents (Mark McKinney, Nancy Walls) to the aged clone (Darrell Hammond) of their unborn child.

Transcript


Spade in America
Summary: David Spade delivers a taped report from the World Series.

Transcript


Alanis Morissette performs "All I Really Want"
Lyrics


Special Ladies
Summary: Paying tribute to The Bridges of Madison County, romance author Robin Walker (Gabriel Byrne) reveals his preference for wooing much older ladies.

Transcript


Rikers Island Guard
Summary: Riker's Island prison warden (Gabriel Byrne) dismisses a guard (Tim Meadows) with a fondness for being anally-raped by the inmates.

Transcript


Goodnights
Transcript



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