Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 21: Episode 9

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


December 16th, 1995

Madeline Kahn



Colin Quinn

NBC's Christmas Salute To Our Bosnian Troops
Summary: Jay Leno (Darrell Hammond) and other celebrities entertain the U.S. troops in Bosnia.

Recurring Characters: Jay Leno, George Burns, Fran Drescher, Courtney Love.


Madeline Kahn's Monologue
Summary: Madeline Kahn uses alternating soprano and frog voices to sing Clarence "Frogman" Henry's "Ain't Got No Home."

Also Hosted: 75s, 77b.


Gangsta Bitch Barbie
Note: Repeat from 10/07/95.

Spartan Cheerleaders
Summary: Craig (Will Ferrell) and Arianna (Cheri Oteri) provide unwelcomed cheers at the high school basketball game.

Recurring Characters: Craig, Arianna.


John-John Mackey's Storm Tracker Accu-Cast
Summary: Tough guy meteorologist John-John Mackey (Tim Meadows) treats bad weather as his personal bitch.


Giant Bird
Summary: Bill (David Koechner) and his wife, Nancy (Madeline Kahn), argue as a giant bird carries them away.


Leg Up
Summary: Russian ballerina Ludmilla Baschenkova (Madeline Kahn) is tonight's special guest.

Recurring Characters: Debbie Reynolds, Ann Miller.

Bush performs "Comedown"

Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald
Summary: St. Nicky (Colin Quinn) tells Norm MacDonald how he became Santa Claus.

Lucien & Fagan's Antique Shop
Summary: Lucien (Mark McKinney) and Fagan (David Koechner) won't break their store's return policy, not even for their top customer (Madeline Kahn).

Recurring Characters: Lucien, Fagan.

Fuzzy Memories
Summary: Jack Handey remembers the time as a kid when he stuck his head out of the car window and accidentally knocked a dog's head off.

Spade in America
Summary: David Spade unveils his wish list for 1996.

Bush performs "Glycerine"

Wedding Vows
Summary: A bride (Madeline Kahn) and groom (Will Ferrell) have awkwardly composed their own vows.

Fuzzy Memories
Summary: Jack Handey remembers a family crisis.

Old Glory Insurance
Summary: Sam Waterston endorses the insurance plan that protects elderly people against robot attacks.

Note: Repeat from 11/18/95.


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