Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 21: Episode 18

This free script provided by

Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


April 20th, 1996

Teri Hatcher

Dave Matthews Band


Steve Higgins

Paula Pell

Unabomber Defense Team
Summary: The Unabomber Ted Kaczynski (Will Ferrell) meets a group of defense attorneys who would like to handle his case.

Recurring Characters: Ted Kaczynski, Johnny Cochran, Leslie Abramson, F. Lee Bailey.



Teri Hatcher's Monologue
Summary: Teri Hatcher is unable to recognize cast members whenever they're wearing glasses.


Old Glory Insurance
Summary: Sam Waterston endorses the insurance plan that protects elderly people against robot attacks.

Note: Repeat from 11/18/95.

Mary Katherine Gallagher
Summary: Prop girl Mary Katherine Gallagher (Molly Shannon) vies for the role of Maria in "West Side Story."

Recurring Characters: Mary Katherine Gallagher, Sean Patrick Flannery.

Mood Music
Summary: A man (Chris Kattan) searches for the perfect seductive mood music to use on his date (Teri Hatcher).


The Princess & The Homeboy
Summary: G-Dog (Tim Meadows) cramps a suburban princess' (Teri Hatcher) style, in a new comedy from NBC!

Recurring Characters: G-Dog.


Spartan Cheerleaders
Summary: Craig (Will Ferrell) and Arianna (Cheri Oteri) part ways when he's offered the chance to be a real Spartan cheerleader.

Recurring Characters: Craig, Arianna.


Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald
Summary: Golfer Greg "The Shark" Norman (Mark McKinney) ponderss a more appropriate nickname.


Dave Matthews Band performs "Too Much"
Also Appeared: 94r, 00m, 03e.

Spade in America
Summary: David Spade (Teri Hatcher) and Teri Hatcher (David Spade) insult one another's careers.

Recurring Characters: David Spade, Teri Hatcher.


The Local News
Summary: Average suburban man Joe Blow (Colin Quinn) hosts a local talk show in his basement.

Recurring Characters: Joe Blow, Uncle Frank, Janette Blow, Joe, Jr.

Fuzzy Memories
Summary: Jack Handey recalls a worm-eating bet from his childhood.

St. Gabriel's Rummage Sale
Summary: While on vist from an outside parish, Barb's (Cheri Oteri) cousin Sheila (Teri Hatcher) challenges Gail Lafferty's (Nancy Walls) authority.

Recurring Characters: Gail Lafferty, Barb, Mary.

Dave Matthews Band performs "So Much To Say"

Petchow Rat Poison
Note: Repeat from 02/17/96.


SNL Transcripts