Air Date: Host: Musical Guest: Special Guests: Cameos:

March 14th, 1998 Julianne Moore Backstreet Boys None None

A Message From the President of the United States

Summary: As President Bill clinton (Darrell Hammond) comments on the Starr Report, Kenneth Starr (Will Ferrell) interrupts the sketch to issue a subpoena to Darrell Hammond. Recurring Characters: President Bill Clinton, Kenneth Starr. Transcript

Montage

Julianne Moore's Monologue

Summary: Gloria Stewart (Cheri Oteri) re-enacts the "Titanic" finale so she can one-up her fellow Oscar nominee, Julianne Moore.

Delicious Dish

Summary: Sorghum expert Audrey Kay (Julianne Moore) reveals that her farm compound is a front for an evil cult. Recurring Characters: Margaret Jo McCullen, Teri Rialto. Transcript

The Ladies Man

Recurring Characters: Leon Phelps. Note: As Don Pardo announcement next week's rebroadcast, Kenneth Starr (Will Ferrell) can be heard entering the booth and issuing Pardo a subpoena.

Barbara Walters Oscar Special

Summary: New student Marissa (Ana Gasteyer) is offended by the sarcastic comments of the teacher (Matthew Perry) and her classmates. Recurring Characters: Barbara Walters, Burt Reynolds. Transcript

Weekend Update with Colin Quinn

Note: Colin Quinn performs Weekend Update alone, with no guest commentators. Transcript

Backstreet Boys performs "As Long As You Love Me"

Pretty Living

Recurring Characters: Gayle Gleason, Helen Madden. Transcript

Heineken

Summary: Kenneth Starr (Will Ferrell) interrupts a Heineken commercial to issue subpoenas to the beer drinkers within.

Terence Maddox

Recurring Characters: Terrence Maddox. Transcript

TV Funhouse

Conspiracy Theory Rock! Note: This cartoon was edited out of all reruns of the episode. Conspiracy?

Good Morning With Liza!

Recurring Characters: Liza Manelli, Captain Montclaire Vanderhausen III.

The Golords

Shirtless Bible Salesmen

Summary: Shirtless salesmen (Will Ferrell, Tim Meadows) have no luck selling a unit to a housewife (Julianne Moore). Transcript

Goodnights