Saturday Night Live Transcripts
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Season 24: Episode 5
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 Air Date:
Host:
Musical Guest:
Special Guests:
Cameos:
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November 7th, 1998
David Spade
Eagle-Eye Cherry
None
Brad Pitt
Chris Rock
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David Spade's Therapy Session
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Summary: Prior to coming back to Studio 8-H to host "Saturday Night Live," David Spade outlines his fear of success to his therapist, Brad Pitt.
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David Spade's Monologue
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Summary: David Spade jokes about about the suspects on "COPS" and a drunken encounter with polar bears at the zoo.
Also Hosted: 04n.
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Mercury Mistress
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Summary: The luxury car that drivers can have sex with.
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Monica's Interviewers
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Recurring Characters: Monica Lewinsky, Barbara Walters, Larry Flynt, Diane Sawyer, Phil Donahue, Howard Stern, Oprah Winfrey.
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Mack North I
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Summary: After beating his opponent Fred Peete in the 6th District race by 8%, Mack North (Will Ferrell) gloats of his victory in a post-election attack ad.
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Accruing Equity & Making Hot, Sweet Love
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Summary: Lawrence Greekmont (Will Ferrell) and his guest panelists will discuss the day's financial news after they get down to the real business - talking about making sweet love.
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Mack North II
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Summary: In his second post-election attack ad, Mack North (Will Ferrell) harrasses loser Fred Peete (Chris Parnell) in a Target parking lot.
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The Sensitive Drill Sergeant
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Mango & Kiwi
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Recurring Characters: Mango, Harvey.
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Mack North III
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Summary: In his final post-election attack ad, Mack North (Will Ferrell) mocks loser Fred Peete with a face mask.
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Happy Birthday, Grandma
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Summary: A dad (Wil Ferrell) forces his three kids to sing "Happy Birthday" over the phone to Grandma, and they'd better not screw up and make him look like an ass.
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Weekend Update with Colin Quinn
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Summary: David Spade returns to the Update desk to deliver a Hollywood Minute, with a little help from a David Spade hand puppet.
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Eagle-Eye Cherry performs "Save Tonight"
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Dr. Laura
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Summary: Dr. Laura Schlessinger (Ana Gasteyer) berates her callers on Take Your Child to Work Day.
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Bachelor Party
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Summary: Shane the Chaperone (David Spade) outlines the ground rules to a group of guys attending a bachelor party.
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SNL Transcripts
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