The Culps

Marty Culp.....Will Ferrell
Bobbi Mohan-Culp.....Ana Gasteyer



[ Marty and Bobbi Mohan-Culp take the stage in front of their keyboard and microphone ]

Marty Culp: Test.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Test.

Marty Culp: Test, 1, 2.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Oops! We've got a real hot mike up here.

Marty Culp: Can we work on that? No? Alright.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: There seems to be a little kafuffle backstage, so we thought we'd just jump up here and cover with some ad libs. I'm Bobbi Mohan-Culp.

Marty Culp: And I'm Marty Culp. We head up the Music Department at Alta Dina Middle School.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: We sure do. Yeah.

Marty Culp: How's about we stir up some musical fun for you, folks. Who likes sing-a-longs? Raise your hands real high.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Sing-a-longs? Anyone?

Marty Culp: Nobody?

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: No?

Marty Culp: No one? Fair enough. Okay. We realize we have a room full of class clowns here.. but there's really nothing funny about the middle finger.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: No. And, uh.. that also includes you, Mr. Joe Pis-co-po.

Marty Culp: I don't know about you people, but Bobbi and I remember the first "Saturday Night Live" very vividly.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: We sure do. It was the first and only night we ever took grass, so.. so, needless to say, we really got a charge out of the skits.

Marty Culp: We really did.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Speed it along?

Marty Culp: Speed it along? Okay. And now, some young men we give an A for musicianship..

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Yeah.

Marty Culp: ..and probably a C for attitude.

Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Yeah.

Marty and Bobbi Mohan-Culp: Ladies and gentlemen.. Beastie Boys!


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