Dr. Evil

.....Mike Myers
.....Lorne Michaels
.....Tim Meadows
.....Kevin Spacey



[ Mike Myers sits with Lorne Michaels in a back office ]

Mike Myers: Well, he's not really based on you, Lorne. You know? He's sort of an amalgam of a lot of different people.. who I, um.. who I respect and admire.

Lorne Michaels: Right. But did you have to name him Dr. Evil?

Mike Myers: [ laughs ] Well, that just happens to be his last name, you know? I mean.. Marvin Gaye is not gay, right?

Lorne Michaels: Yeah.

Mike Myers: And, you know, Dr. Evil's a really likeable character, Lorne. I mean, he likes animals, he loves his son..

Lorne Michaels: Ri-ight.

Mike Myers: And he loves power.. and money.. That's good, right?

Lorne Michaels: Ri-ight.

Mike Myers: Anyways, you know what? You know, Dr. Evil's nothing like you, Lorne. I mean, you don't have your "henchmen" kill people.

Lorne Michaels: No.. no, not since the 70's.

[ Tim Meadows enters ]

Tim Meadows: Hey, Mike!

Lorne Michaels: Hey, Tim.

Tim Meadows: Hey, Dr. Evil!

Mike Myers: Hey, he's not Dr. Evil, Tim! Okay? He's not! Alright, buddy? Thank you! [ stands ] I mean, you're not! You know? You're not Dr. Evil! Okay? He's so not Dr. Evil, it's crazy how not Dr. Evil he is!

[ Mike exits ]

Lorne Michaels: Tim, should I be worried about this Dr. Evil thing?

Tim Meadows: [ sits ] No, Lorne. I don't think a lot of people saw that movie.

[ Kevin Spacey enters ]

Kevin Spacey: Hey, Tim.

Tim Meadows: Hey.

Kevin Spacey: Hey, Lorne, you were great in "Austin Powers", just so hilarious! Evil. Really funny.

Lorne Michaels: Thank you.

Kevin Spacey: And you were great, too, Mini Lorne Michaels.

[ camera zooms out to reveal a miniarure Lorne Michaels standing on a chair ]

Mini Lorne: Thanks, Kevin!

Lorne Michaels: How are you, Mini Lorne? Are you hungry? Would you like a Hot Pocket? Could I get a friggin' Hot Pocket around here?!

[ Tim rushes out for a Hot Pocket, as Lorne and Mini Lorne bite their pinky finger ]


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