SNL Transcripts: Kate Hudson: 10/14/00: Rabun to Shuri

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 26: Episode 2



00b: Kate Hudson / Radiohead

Rabun to Shuri

Rabun…..Maya Rudolph
Shuri…..Kate Hudson
Lenny…..Jimmy Fallon
Squiggy…..Chris Kattan
Karumain…..Chris Parnell

[ TV Nippon logo appear; Japanese music starts playing ]

Female Announcer: You are watching TV Nippon.

Announcer: Minasama, minasama, goteyamakikku-sabano… Rabun to Shuri!

[ Super: Rabun To Shuri ] [ cut to opening sequence; Rabun and Shuri are skipping down a sidewalk ]

Rabun and Shuri: Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, roku, shichi, hachi, samieru, shumazu, Hantenbana Incorporated! [ giggles, then runs off ] [ cue music; show Rabun and Shuri doing various tasks: pulling a Biore strip off Rabun’s forehead; working at the Asahi bottling plant; dancing and running into each other ]

Music: “Kihono kihona matte, nakiyanowarimatte, watashi-yaji-ya-noito… Kitteru matte, to matte, anatano… tarakuu… watashiuuuu…”

[ show Rabun and Shuri together; actors names “Miho Kajiyama” and “Yuki Akugai” appear on screen ]

Female Announcer: Rabun to Shuri osaki ni, Live Studio Audience.

[ open sketch inside Rabun and Shuri’s apartment ] [ Shuri runs in, looking around for something ]

Shuri: Rabun! Rabun! Watashi-no “Bobo Kitty-chan”, hajime-mashitte!

Rabun: [ stands ] Shuu-ri! Anata no Bobo Kitty-chan, nanidenowa?

Rabun and Shuri: [ calling out as they search through things in the apartment ] Bobo Kitty-chan! Bobo Kitty-chan!! Bobo Kitty-chan!!!

Rabun: Shuu-ri! Mitte-ano. [ they sit down at the table ] Milk to Pepsi wa, arimasuyo?

Shuri: [ picks up the cup, smells it, then puts it down ] Ooo, miruku beshi, ooh. Watashi!

[ Suddenly, sliding doors open, and Lenny and Squiggy appear ]

Lenny and Squiggy: Kon-nichiwa!!!

[ the two stumble clumsily down the stairs ]

Lenny: Konnichiwa, Rabun.

Shuri: Renny, Suku-iigii, watashi no Bobo Kitty-chan, dorichi-wa?

Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ]

Rabun: Renny, Sukuiigii, anata-no Bobo Kitty-chan, doko desuka?

Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ] [ Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ] [ cut to TV Nippon logo, then a commercial: A little Japanese boy runs through a grocery store. Then show a cockroach crawling to the center of the screen.]

Ad Jingle: Tan-chin, tan-chin… koki pokko!

[ The cockroach magically turns into a pastry. Show product logo (a wacky duck) as Japanese boy runs off the screen ] [ back to Rabun To Shuri… Karumain enters room ]

Karumain: [ singing ] Onagi-to no Rags to Riches!

Rabun and Shuri: Karumain!

[ Karumain jumps off stairs stylishly, then takes a stuffed animal, Bobo Kitty-chan, and hands it to Shuri ]

Karumain: Bobo Kitty!

Shuri: Oah! Karumain, domo! [ bows ]

Rabun: Domo! [ bows repeatedly ] Karumain, domo arigato-gozaimasu!

[ everyone in the room is now bowing over and over at each other ] [ Lenny and Squiggy bow heads towards each other, bumping their heads together and stumbling back ] [ as everyone laughs at what happened, Karumain takes Shuri’s hand and pulls her over in his arms romantically ]

Karumain: Shuri…

Shuri: [ stopping Karumain ] Ah… cold shower! Cold shower!

Lenny and Squiggy: Cold showa?! [ starts taking off their clothing; Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ] [ cue closing music ]

Music: Watashi-uuuuu…

[ SUPER: Executive Producers: Gekko Mitzusaka, Taki Mazaki, Eitoko Miki ]

Submitted by: Paul Buxton

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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