Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 26: Episode 2
Rabun to Shuri
Female Announcer: You are watching TV Nippon.
Announcer: Minasama, minasama, goteyamakikku-sabano… Rabun to Shuri![ Super: Rabun To Shuri ] [ cut to opening sequence; Rabun and Shuri are skipping down a sidewalk ]
Rabun and Shuri: Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, roku, shichi, hachi, samieru, shumazu, Hantenbana Incorporated! [ giggles, then runs off ] [ cue music; show Rabun and Shuri doing various tasks: pulling a Biore strip off Rabun’s forehead; working at the Asahi bottling plant; dancing and running into each other ]
Music: “Kihono kihona matte, nakiyanowarimatte, watashi-yaji-ya-noito… Kitteru matte, to matte, anatano… tarakuu… watashiuuuu…”[ show Rabun and Shuri together; actors names “Miho Kajiyama” and “Yuki Akugai” appear on screen ]
Female Announcer: Rabun to Shuri osaki ni, Live Studio Audience.[ open sketch inside Rabun and Shuri’s apartment ] [ Shuri runs in, looking around for something ]
Shuri: Rabun! Rabun! Watashi-no “Bobo Kitty-chan”, hajime-mashitte!
Rabun: [ stands ] Shuu-ri! Anata no Bobo Kitty-chan, nanidenowa?
Rabun and Shuri: [ calling out as they search through things in the apartment ] Bobo Kitty-chan! Bobo Kitty-chan!! Bobo Kitty-chan!!!
Rabun: Shuu-ri! Mitte-ano. [ they sit down at the table ] Milk to Pepsi wa, arimasuyo?
Shuri: [ picks up the cup, smells it, then puts it down ] Ooo, miruku beshi, ooh. Watashi![ Suddenly, sliding doors open, and Lenny and Squiggy appear ]
Lenny and Squiggy: Kon-nichiwa!!![ the two stumble clumsily down the stairs ]
Lenny: Konnichiwa, Rabun.
Shuri: Renny, Suku-iigii, watashi no Bobo Kitty-chan, dorichi-wa?
Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ]
Rabun: Renny, Sukuiigii, anata-no Bobo Kitty-chan, doko desuka?
Lenny and Squiggy: [ throwing hands up and shrugging shoulders ] Wakarimasu! [ throws kisses at Rabun and Shuri ] [ Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ] [ cut to TV Nippon logo, then a commercial: A little Japanese boy runs through a grocery store. Then show a cockroach crawling to the center of the screen.]
Ad Jingle: Tan-chin, tan-chin… koki pokko![ The cockroach magically turns into a pastry. Show product logo (a wacky duck) as Japanese boy runs off the screen ] [ back to Rabun To Shuri… Karumain enters room ]
Karumain: [ singing ] Onagi-to no Rags to Riches!
Rabun and Shuri: Karumain![ Karumain jumps off stairs stylishly, then takes a stuffed animal, Bobo Kitty-chan, and hands it to Shuri ]
Karumain: Bobo Kitty!
Shuri: Oah! Karumain, domo! [ bows ]
Rabun: Domo! [ bows repeatedly ] Karumain, domo arigato-gozaimasu![ everyone in the room is now bowing over and over at each other ] [ Lenny and Squiggy bow heads towards each other, bumping their heads together and stumbling back ] [ as everyone laughs at what happened, Karumain takes Shuri’s hand and pulls her over in his arms romantically ]
Shuri: [ stopping Karumain ] Ah… cold shower! Cold shower!
Lenny and Squiggy: Cold showa?! [ starts taking off their clothing; Rabun and Shuri look at each other in amusement ] [ cue closing music ]
Music: Watashi-uuuuu…[ SUPER: Executive Producers: Gekko Mitzusaka, Taki Mazaki, Eitoko Miki ]
Submitted by: Paul Buxton