SNL Transcripts: Julia Stiles: 03/17/01


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 30: Episode 15

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


March 17th, 2001

Julia Stiles



David Copperfield
Martha Stewart LivingSummary: Martha Stewart (Ana Gasteyer) presents her tips for surviving St. Patrick’s Day.

Recurring Characters: Martha Stewart.



Julia Stiles’ MonologueSummary: Tracy Morgan hits on Julia Stiles after finding out she danced with a black guy in “Save The Last Dance.”

Bio: Prior to her starring role in “Save The Last Dance”, actress Julia Stiles (1981-) played a teen seductress opposite Alec Baldwin in the Hollywood satire, “State and Main.”


HomocilSummary: The pill parents take to relieve the stress of having a gay child in their household.

Note: Repeat from 02/17/01.

Wake Up, WakefieldSummary: Classmate Samantha (Julia Stiles) tells Megan (Maya Rudolph) about the school’s upcoming production of “Hair.”

Recurring Characters: Megan, Sheldon, Mr. Banglion, Randy Goldman.


Jackie Gives AttitudeSummary: At the post office, rude Jackie (Maya Rudolph) gets a taste of her own medicine from an irate customer (Julia Stiles).

Recurring Characters: Jackie.

Aerosmith performs “Jaded”Also Appeared: 89m, 93c, 96p.

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina FeySummary: Arnold Schwarzenegger (Darrell Hammond) comments on his campaign for Governor of California. Jimmy and Tina learn that illusionist David Copperfield controls the cue cards.

Suel Forrester Directs A MovieSummary: No one can understand mumbly director Suel Forrestor’s (Chirs Kattan) orders.

Recurring Characters: Suel Forrestor.

BeppiSummary: Foreign sisters (Rachel Dratch, Julia Stiles) clean up an office after business hours.

“The Doberman!”Summary: Adam McKay film focuses on a man (Will Ferrell) being attacked by a doberman.

Apollo Theater Amateur NightSummary: A white girl (Julia Stiles) is only able to find success at the Apollo Theater when she partners with a black man (Jerry Minor).

Willy Sluggs Eye PoppersSummary: The magic of Willy Sluggs (Jerry Minor) is not really all that amazing.

Aerosmith performs “Big Ten Inch Record”

Der Lacheln BeherrschtSummary: The German kids’ show proves to be too upsetting for its young target audience.


Van Morrison St. Patrick’s Day MessageSummary: Van Morrison (Jimmy Fallon) drinks Guinness while singing.


SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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