SNL Transcripts: Alec Baldwin: 04/07/01



 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 26: Episode 16


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Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

Cameos:



Bit Players:


April 7th, 2001

Alec Baldwin

Coldplay

None

Kid Rock

David Spade

None
A Message From the President of the United StatesSummary: President George W. Bush (Will Ferrell) delivers a list of his orders to China.

Recurring Characters: President George W. Bush.

Transcript

Montage

Alec Baldwin’s MonologueSummary: Bill Clinton (Darrell Hammond) gives now-single Alec Baldwin some pointers on meeting women.

Recurring Characters: Bill Clinton.

Reliable InvestmentsSummary: While advising an investor (Ana Gasteyer) on recent Wall Street woes, a broker (Alec Baldwin) jumps to his death.

Transcript

Delicious DishSummary: Pete Schweddy (Alec Baldwin) discusses his new ball park weiner business with Margaret Jo McCullen (Ana Gasteyer) and new co-anchor Lynn Bershad (Rachel Dratch).

Recurring Characters: Margaret Jo McCullen, Pete Schweddy.

Transcript

Tough GuySummary: Sgt. Jack Wilcox (Alec Baldwin) lets his fellow soldiers knows that he’s ready to take on the Chinese single-handedly.

Transcript

Inside the Actors StudioSummary: Charles Nelson Reilly (Alec Baldwin) receives the royal treatment from James Lipton (Will Ferrell).

Recurring Characters: James Lipton.

Transcript

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina FeySummary: Tracy Morgan discusses what happened with Daryl Strawberry. Jimmy Fallon delivers “I Have An Opinion” International. Tina Fey delivers a rant against Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends. Kid Rock and David Spade present the latest Hollywood Minute news.

Transcript

Coldplay performs “Yellow”

Red Ships of SpainSummary: Robert Goulet (Will Ferrell) and his brothers Wes (Chris Parnell) and Ken (Alec Baldwin) star together in a new musical.

Recurring Characters: Robert Goulet.

Transcript

The Bush Tax CutSummary: Tom Daschle (Chris Kattan) and Richard Gephardt (Darrell Hammond) ruin a press conference while discussing the Bush tax cut.

Recurring Characters: Richard Gephardt.

Lasting ImpressionsSummary: Artists Tony Villone (Alec Baldwin) and Ricky (Jimmy Fallon) show how to add a touch of class to photos by painting them inside of a brandy snifter.

Transcript

Coldplay performs “Don’t Panic”

Goodnights

Barnes&Noble.com

Dress Rehearsal Cuts

Terrence MaddoxSummary: Terrence Maddox (Will Ferrell) and fellow vagrant Sebastian Clay (Alec Baldwin) compete to be the subjects of a Black & White photograpy class.

Recurring Characters: Terrance Maddox.

Transcript

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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