Fenced-In Area


01f: Billy Bob Thornton / Creed

Fenced-In Area

Travis…..Billy Bob Thornton
Neighbor…..Will Ferrell
Brother…..Seth Meyers
Wife…..Maya Rudolph
Momma…..Ana Gasteyer
Pastor Moore…..Chris Kattan

[ open on exterior shot of farmhouse ] [ dissolve to Travis holding a beer and staring at a fenced-in area of his yard, as his neighbor enters his yard ]

Travis: Hey.

Neighbor: Hey. [ a beat ] What’s going on with your fenced-in area?

Travis: [ thinking ] Well.. I fenced it in. Now I’m gonna do something with it. I’m thinking I might put in a basketball court or a pool.

Neighbor: This fenced-in area is not big enough for a pool.

Travis: [ thinking ] You know, maybe you’re right. Maybe I’ll get me a rottweiler, put it in there.

Neighbor: You can’t jam a rottweiler into your iny fenced-in area. How long has it been since you put in your fenced-in area?

Travis: Oh, eighteen months, thereabouts.

Neighbor: [ surprised ] Really? Has it been that long?

Travis: Yeah, you know that.

Neighbor: [ thinking ] I know. Why don’t you stack those tires in there?

Travis: [ put off ] I’m not gonna stack those tires in there!

Neighbor: Lord, I’m just trying to help.

Travis: [ peeved ] Well, leave it alone! What do you mean, coming in a man’s yard, telling him what to do about his own fenced-in area!

Neighbor: Well, you’re never gonna do anything with it.

Travis: You shut your mouth!

Neighbor: You know, what, I liked you better before you had your fenced-in area!

Travis: Well, you get the hell out of my yard, then!

Neighbor: Fine, then! [ exits yard ] [ Brother enters from back porch ]

Brother: Hey.

Travis: Hey, little brother.

Brother: I figured you’d be back here by the fenced-in area.

Travis: Yup.

Brother: How’s it coming?

Travis: [ semi-confident ] I’m thinking about storing my lawnmower in there. Maybe some tools.

Brother: But don’t you already keep those things in the shed.

Travis: [ slightly peeved ] What?

Brother: Sorry. [ pause ] Hey, I’m gonna go drink some beers, and then go key Jeff Turner’s three-wheeler! You wanna come?

Travis: No, I think I’m just gonna.. mess around here by my fenced-in area.

Brother: Alright. [ turns away ] Hey, bro? I miss you. [ exits ]

Wife: [ enters from back porch ] Honey, come inside!

Travis: I’ll be in in a minute.

Wife: Honey, you promised me you were gonna make something with that fenced-in area!

Travis: Can’t you see I’m trying?!

Wife: No! You just drink beer and stare at it! I told you, it was either me, or the fenced-in area, and you chose the fenced-in area! Now, I am moving to Myrtle Beach to make my t-shirts! Have a nice life! [ exits to interior porch area ]

Travis: You just don’t understand! You’ll be back! [ to himself ] You’ll be back, alright..

[ dissolve to exterior shot of farmhouse ] [ dissolve to Travis standing over his fenced-in area as Momma enters from back porch ]

Momma: Son, I’m so sorry Amy left you. I made you a green bean casserole.

Travis: [ somber ] Thank you, Momma.

Momma: Travis? Honey? Please. This fenced-in area is ruining your life! Just admit it, you’re never gonna do anything with it!

Travis: You don’t believe in me, Momma! You think I’m a failure!

Momma: No, I think your fenced-in area is a failure!

Travis: Same thing! [ Pastor Moore enters from the back porch ] Pastor Moore? What’s he doing here?

Momma: I thought you might need somebody to talk to.

Pastor Moore: I was thinking you might want to stop by the church. We could talk about the fenced-in area. If you want.

[ reflective banjo music pots up ]

Travis: I think there’s something I need to make clear about my fenced-in area. You see.. everybody in Gilbert County’s got a damn fenced-in area that’s cluttered with crap and brown weeds invading them like a cancer! Well, see, I’m better than that. I’m gonna make my fenced-in area an area that’s neat and special, with a special purpose. And then all the nayayers will have to say, “Dammit! He really did something with his fenced-in area, and now I feel inspired to clean up my own fenced-in area!” And others will see my fenced-in area, and inspiration will go on and on and on, from person to person, just like that! [ reflective pause ] I want my fenced-in area to be an inspiration. And.. if y’all an’t understand that.. then I was born in the wrong world.

Momma: Oh, my God, honey! I’m so proud of you!

Pastor Moore: God bless you.. and your fenced-in area. We’ll let you get back to work.

[ Momma and Pastor Moore back away as the camera zooms out to fade ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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