SNL Transcripts: Hugh Jackman: 12/08/01

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 27: Episode 8


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December 8th, 2001

Hugh Jackman

Mick Jagger

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White House MeetingSummary: Al Gore (Darrell Hammond) phones the White House during a crucial meeting.

Recurring Characters: President George W. Bush, Vice-President Dick Cheney, Al Gore, Donald Rumsfeld.

Transcript

Montage

Hugh Jackman’s MonologueSummary: Hugh Jackman sings “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas.”

Transcript

Loose BearSummary: Loose Bear scares the crap out of you when you’re constipated.

Transcript

Jarret’s RoomSummary: Jarret (Jimmy Fallon) and Gobey (Horatio Sanz) crack up over their suitemate’s (Jeff Richards) embarrassing home videos.

Recurring Characters: Jarret, Gobey, D.J. Jonathan Feinstein.

Transcript

The Robert Goulet All-Holiday SpecialRecurring Characters: Robert Goulet.

Transcript

Family Christmas PortraitSummary: Messed-up photographers (Hugh Jackman, Seth Meyers) wreck havoc for a family posing for a portrait at Sear’s.

Mick Jagger performs “God Give Me Everything I Want”Also Appeared: 92l

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina FeySummary: Chris Kattan’s gives a Terrible Re-Enactment of Geraldo Rivera’s fall in Afghanistan. Drunk Girl (Jeff Richards) hits on Jimmy Fallon during her commentary.

Recurring Characters: Drunk Girl.

Transcript

Hello, DollySummary: More grotesque – yet, cute – dolls are put on display.

Recurring Characters: Deanna Nolen Gray.

Mick Jagger’s Dressing RoomSummary: Mick Jagger talks to his reflection (Jimmy Fallon) in his dressing room mirror.

Transcript

Superman’s Fortress of SolitudeSummary: Superman’s (Hugh Jackman) parents (Will Ferrell, Maya Rudolph) make awkward small talk with their son.

Recurring Characters: Superman.

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Mick Jagger performs “Vision Of Paradise”

The Donatella Versace ShowSummary: Donatella Versace (Maya Rudolph) interviews fashion experts.

Recurring Characters: Donatella Versace.

The Christmas KangarooSummary: Hugh Jackman recalls his dad (Will Ferrell) fighting with the Christmas Kangaroo, and subsequently getting anal-raped.

Transcript

Goodnights

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Dress Rehearsal Cuts

Little SleuthsSummary: Little sleuths Bookie Newton (Seth Meyers) and kid sister Sam (Amy Poehler) help early 1900’s British detective Alistair Chesterfield (Hugh Jackman) deduce who killed Lady Worthington.

Recurring Characters: Bookie Newton, Sam.

Note: This sketch appears as a bonus feature on SNL’s Best of Amy Poehler DVD.

Transcript

SNL Transcripts