My Best List For 2001 by Jack Handey

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01j: Josh Hartnett / Pink

My Best List For 2001 by Jack Handey


V/O: My Best List for 2001, by Jack Handey.

Best Planet: Earth.

Best Canyon: Grand Canyon.

Best Hawaiian Dance: The Hula.

Best Flat Italian Pie: Pizza.

Best God: God.

Best Vampire: Dracula.

Best Candy Lips: Wax Lips.

Best Bee Prouct: (tie) Wax and Honey.

Best Monster: (tie) Dracula and Wax Head.

Best Parrot Name: (tie) Polly and Waxy.

Best Suey: (tie) Chop Suey and Chop Suey with Wax.

Sexiest Actor: Wax Tom Cruise.

Best Whole Ball: Whole Ball of Wax.

Best Thing of Anything: A Bat Carrying a Block of Wax.

Announcer: Jack Handey’s Best List for 2001 was made possible by generous contributions from: The National Wax Association and The Count and Countess Dracula Foundation.

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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