SNL Transcripts: Jon Stewart: 03/09/02


Air Date:

Host:

Musical Guest:

Special Guests:

March 9th, 2002

Jon Stewart

India.Arie

George Plimpton

India.Arie, “Video”

  • A Message From the Vice-President of the United States

    Vice-President Cheney (Darrell Hammond) addresses Letterman issue.

    Recurring Characters: Dick Cheney.

  • Jon Stewart’s Monologue

    Stewart jokes about cable television and gays in the military.

  • The Cheese Game

    Game helps kids learn to appreciate the value of cheese.

  • TRL

    Lou Perlstein (Stewart) shows off genetically-mutated boy band.

  • The Bloder Brothers

    Kip (Jimmy Fallon) & Wayne (Chris Parnell) get detained at the airport.

    Recurring Characters: Kip Bloder, Wayne Bloder.

  • TV Funhouse

    Fun With Real Audio mocks Colin Powell’s M-TV chat with teenagers.

  • Talking to the Stars With Rachel and Tracy

    Rachel Dratch and Tracy Morgan interview Stewart.

  • Newscaster Party

    David Letterman (Jeff Richards) appears at Ted Koppel’s (Darrell Hammond) party.

    Recurring Characters: Dan Rather, Tom Brokaw, Ted Koppel, Helen Thomas,

    Starr Jones, David Letterman.

  • Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina Fey

    Chris Kattan gives a Terrible Re-Enactment of John McEnroe firing.

    Jon Stewart jumps in when Jimmy Fallon is incapacitated.

    Drunk Girl gives tips for a safe Spring Break.

    Recurring Characters: Drunk Girl.

  • India.Arie performs “Video”

  • BET Jazz: Jazzvisions

    Spoon instrumentalist Lonny Bartz (Stewart) discusses his music career.

  • We Were Soldiers That Knew What Women Want

    Mel Gibson (Stewart) movie combo poorly addresses two subjects.

  • India.Arie performs “Ready For Love”

  • My Big Thick Novel

    Author debates whether or not he should jump from party.

    SNL Transcripts

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