SNL Transcripts: Matt Damon: 10/05/02: The NRA II


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 28: Episode 1

02a: Matt Damon / Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band


Hunter #1…..Horatio Sanz
Hunter #2…..Jimmy Fallon
Carrot Top…..Seth Meyers

[ open on two hunters squatting behind marsh weeds, still looking for potential kills ]

Hunter #2: I don’t think we’re gonna get anything else.

Hunter #1: You wanna call it a day?

Hunter #2: Ah, hang on.. I got one more idea.. Hey, what’s the best way to make a collect call?

Hunter #1: I don’t know..

[ Carrot Top suddnely surfaces from the weeds, clutching a pay phone ]

Carrot Top: Hey, big game hunters!! Fixin’ to make a collect call?! Then make sure you dial 1-800-CALL-ATT!

[ Hunter #1 raises his gun, Carrot Top cowers in sudden fear ]

Hunter #2: Dude! Wait! [ a beat ] Remember to take the safety off.

Hunter #1: Right.

[ the hunters fire their guns at Carrot Top ]

Carrot Top V/O: Hey! You guys owe me a new phone!

Announcer: Remember to take the safety off. A friendly reminder from the National Rifle Association.

[ fade ]

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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