SNL Transcripts: Sarah Michelle Gellar: 10/12/02: Corona III

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 28: Episode 2

02b: Sarah Michelle Gellar / Faith Hill

Corona III

Craig…..Jimmy Fallon
Voice of Wife…..Amy Poehler

[ open on couple still sitting in beach chairs along the ocean; Craig still snoring as his cell phone rings once more ] [ Craig reaches for his cell phone, but drunkenly throws a bottle toward the ocean, hitting a passerby smack in the head ]

Wife: I can’t believe you just did that!

Craig: ..what..?

Wife: You hit that guy in the head! He could have, like, brain damage, or something.

Craig: [ groggy ] Well.. tell my peckerwood boss to stop calling me!

Wife: Craig, your boss is not calling — [ police enter the scene ] Oh, my God.. the police..

Craig: [ snoring ]

Wife: Craig.. Craig, let’s go..

Craig: Where..? Senor Phrogg’s..?

Wife: Craig, let’s go!

Craig: Alright.. let me get my brews..

[ SUPER: “Miles away from sober.” ]

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