Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 28: Episode 13
02m: Christopher Walken / Foo Fighters
Christopher Walken’s Monologue
…..Christopher Walken
Christopher Walken: Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
[ audience applauds wildly ]
You know.. this is..
[ audience seems unable to stop applauding; it’s Christopher Walken, after all ]
You know.. this is the part of the show.. where you can be.. yourself.. and do whatever you want. Hit it!
[ the SNL Band strikes up a tune behind Walken, as he sings and dances for the audience’s delight ]
[singing, and dancing ]
“I know why I waited
Know why I’ve been blue.
Prayed each night for someone
Exactly like you!
Why should we spend money
on a show or two?
No one does those love scenes
exactly like you!
Now, I know my mother
taught me to be true
She meant me for someone
exactly like you!”
[ stops singing, returns to his speech ]
You see.. we tried.. all week..
[ audience explodes with applause ]
All week, we tried to think of something to do at the top of the show, and couldn’t. Then, I thought.. I’ve done the show six times, just.. get it over with! I can do crazy mix-em-ups. Whatever I want! I can tap dance.
[ moves his feet rapidly, in an effort to keep up with the tap-dancing sound effects ]
And then I remembered.. what always works: Girls!!
[ Las Vegas-style showgirls surround Walken and dance, as he continues his song ]
“I know my mother
taught me to be true
She meant me for someone
exactly like you!”
[ to the showgirls ] Thank you, and you.. [ faces the audience ] We got a great show for you. Foo Fighters are here. So.. stick around.. we’ll be right back.
