Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 29: Episode 9]]>
Air Date:
Host:
Musical Guest:
Special Guests:
January 10th, 2004
Jennifer Aniston
Black Eyed Peas
Al Franken An Address By Donald TrumpSummary: Donald Trump (Darrell Hammond) discusses his new reality show.
Recurring Characters: Donald Trump, Jeff Zucker.
Transcript
Montage
Jennifer Aniston’s MonologueSummary: Jennifer Aniston shows a fake clip of the final episode of “Friends”, in which a dejected Joey (Horatio Sanz) takes his own life.
Transcript
Paparazzi PhotographersSummary: Paparazzi photographers (Amy Poehler, Jennifer Aniston) harrass and photograph celebrities.
Recurring Characters: Paparazzi Photographer.
Transcript
Britney Spears WeddingSummary: Britney Spears (Jennifer Aniston) marries and divorces her buddy, Jason Alexander (Jimmy Fallon).
Recurring Characters: Britney Spears.
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GaystrogenSummary: The pill that prevents middle-aged homosexuals from losing their gay sex drive.
Note: Repeat from 10/18/03.
Democratic National CommitteeSummary: Democratic candidates doubt their capabilities.
Recurring Characters: Wesley Clark, John Edwards, Richard Gephardt, John Kerry, Joe Lieberman, Al Sharpton.
Transcript
Black Eyed Peas performs “Where Is The Love?”Bio: American hip-hop group Black Eyed Peas are will.i.am, Apl.de.ap, Taboo, and Fergie.
Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina FeySummary: Steve Irwin (Jeff Richards) mixes up his baby with a chicken. Jimmy Fallon stops O.J. Simpson (Finesse Mitchell) from confessing. One man mobile uplink unit Al Franken interviews troops in Baghdad.
Recurring Characters: Steve Irwin, O.J. Simpson.
Transcript
Saddam Calls OsamaSummary: Saddam Hussein (Horatio Sanz) makes an unfunny phone call to Osama bin Laden (Jimmy Fallon).
Recurring Characters: Saddam Hussein, Osama bin Laden.
Country RosesSummary: Country artists (Jennifer Aniston, Maya Rudolph) compete for the same man in a compilation album.
Transcript
Coco & Matsui Super ShowSummary: Japanese hosts Coco (Maya Rudolph) and Matsui (Fred Armisen) weep at Jennifer Aniston’s presence.
Recurring Characters: Coco, Matsui.
Black Eyed Peas performs “Hey Mama”
Appalachian Emergency RoomSummary: Country bumpkins have a series of strange injuries treated.
Recurring Characters: Receptionist, Percy Bo Dance, Netti Bo Dance, Tyler.
Phone SexSummary: A nerdy operator (Jennifer Aniston) doesn’t know how to talk dirty to her clients.
Transcript
GoodnightsTranscript