SNL Transcripts: Queen Latifah: 10/09/04: Excedrin

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 Saturday Night Live Transcripts


  Season 30: Episode 2




04b: Queen Latifah

Excedrin

Linda…..Queen Latifah

Linda: Do I get stress headaches at work? Yes, definitely. From the moment I get in, it’s “Denise, we need this,” “Denise we need that.” Which is stressful, because my name is Linda. Denise is the other black woman that works here. By 10 a.m., someone in the copy room makes a joke about Kobe Bryant, and everyone looks at me to make sure it’s okay. And I smile like it’s okay, but, really, my head and neck are starting to throb. Then I spend the rest of the afternoon training my interns and answering their questions, like, “Yes, black people use shampoo,” and “No, I don’t know any good reggae clubs around here,” and “Yes, Condoleeza Rice is very articulate, why do you sound so surprised?” And, “No, I can’t tell you where to buy weed!”

[ holds up product ]

And that’s when I reach for.. Excedrin. New Excedrin for racial tension headaches. Excedrin R.T. works fast. Taking me from “Oh no you didn’t!” to “I wish the motherf—er would!”

Announcer: Excedrin. For racial tension headaches. Fast relief for hundreds of years of nagging pain.

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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