SNL Transcripts: Alec Baldwin: 12/10/05: Tylenol BM


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 31: Episode 8

05h: Alec Baldwin / Shakira

Tylenol BM

Businessman…..Alec Baldwin
Wife…..Rachel Dratch

[open on home office with businessman]

Businessman: [removes glasses] I work a lot. And I’m successful for it, but my workdays were turning into worknights. I’d come home and go straight to bed. [dissolve to businessman lying awake in bed while he continues speaking as voice over] And even though I was exhausted, I’d lay there forever, my mind racing. [dissolve to home office] And then I found Tylenol BM. [holds up box in tight shot] I never liked the idea of taking a sleeping pill, but with Tylenol BM I know I’m going to get a good night sleep. It puts my mind at rest, and I sleep soundly. So soundly, I sleep through my first dump in the morning.

[dissolve to businessman sleeping in bed next to his wife]

Voice Over: Tylenol BM releases a gentle sleep aid into your system that allows deep, restful sleep for up to ten hours. [a graphic superimposed over the businessman shows a blue aura surrounding him] So deep, it turns off your brain’s need to control the bodily functions most likely to wake you, allowing you to sleep without urgency or interruption.

[daylight streams into the bedroom, and the businessman stretches and sits up]

Businessman: I’m ready for another day. I’ve slept like a baby.

Wife: [sitting up] Don! Did you [bleep] the bed?! [jumps out of the bed]

Businessman: [yawns] You tell me.

[dissolve to Tylenol BM box and bottle]

Voice Over: Tylenol BM.

[dissolve to businessman]

Businessman: Thanks, Tylenol BM. [stands and gathers comforter around himself]

Submitted by: DavidK93

SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King has directed fourteen seasons of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him ten Emmys and fourteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for fifteen DGA Awards and won in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020.

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